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Young men reveal why so many of them are single: ‘Dates feel more like job interviews’
- Thread starter DeepEnigma
- Start date
Artoris
Gold Member
I miss the days when computers were only for nerds
a multicultural team of v
Member
I agree, I don't think the people in the OP have any idea what they want.
I also have a theory that some guys are actually undateable - as in they are put together and normal enough (even if they seem totally average from the outside) that a woman isn't going to ever want to just date them, they will always consider them long term material and approach the relationship that way from the first date. That guy is complaining about being asked about kids on the first date, but I am willing to bet his emotional intelligence is just very poor and didn't realize she was asking because she is already considering him long term material and was just too excited to stop herself, not that she has some "interview" checklist she was going down. Which funny enough is the opposite situation than many of the comments in the thread - she wasn't part of the 80/20 rule where she was filtering him out immediately and ready to move on to the other 50 matches (which don't get me wrong I fully believe is a thing). She actually was already preparing herself to pick him and meanwhile he is complaining that he can't find anyone. HE is going to be the one at 35 freaking out in an article asking why can't he find a serious relationship, not her lol
SlimySnake
Flashless at the Golden Globes
The other dude was worse than all the women combined lol. He straight up started cursing at the girls calling them whores in one clip.
He definitely needs to get smarter women to appear on the panel. He's very smart but the discussion isnt. The problem is that no one in their right mind would go on that show so he gets these onlyfans and instagram models who arent all that bright. Of course, their body count will be higher than the average girls. of course, they are going to be far more entitled than average girls.
German Hops
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
Seriously though, do people really think that you can flip sexual orientation like a light switch?
You guys are hilarious and insane.
Thirty7ven
Banned
It’s true, in the states at least women approaching 30 are out there looking for a career when it comes to relationships.
The appfication of relationships has turned it into a data driven enterprise. Robotic shit.
The appfication of relationships has turned it into a data driven enterprise. Robotic shit.
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Lukaku's First Touch
Member
I'm a dad and I would never want a women with kids if I end up solo.
Seriously though, do people really think that you can flip sexual orientation like a light switch?
You guys are hilarious and insane.
Maybe not a light switch, but a gate...
Synless
Member
I don’t envy the future gens.
I teach and mentor my sons to get to know women and how they think now while they are young, be risky with topics to break standard conversation molds, and learn that it’s ok to strike out and not let it hurt your confidence.
My only goal is to make them as comfortable talking to women and find out how to make them laugh while staying out of friend zones. I figure it will be invaluable in these future generations.
I teach and mentor my sons to get to know women and how they think now while they are young, be risky with topics to break standard conversation molds, and learn that it’s ok to strike out and not let it hurt your confidence.
My only goal is to make them as comfortable talking to women and find out how to make them laugh while staying out of friend zones. I figure it will be invaluable in these future generations.
German Hops
GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief
Maybe not a light switch, but a gate...
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Fools idol
Banned
I'm hoping by the time my 4 year old 'comes of age' the world will have moved on from social media.
One can hope.
I can't even imagine what the world looks like in 10 years time though but eh.
One can hope.
I can't even imagine what the world looks like in 10 years time though but eh.
SlimySnake
Flashless at the Golden Globes
future gens will have robots for companions. everyone will be banging perfect 10 models and then sticking them in the closet at night.
Aesius
Member
I was in high school in the early to mid 00s. Just before social media hit. Back then you could legitimately "discover" attractive, quiet girls who didn't have the inflated egos (which was always a thing among the outgoing popular girls).
My long-term high school GF had a few orbiters around her when we met but they were total nerds. I really had almost no competition when I pursued her because she was somewhat shy and introverted despite being really attractive.
But if we flashed forward 20 years and were in high school, she would probably have a shit ton of social media followers and wouldn't give me the time of day.
There's always more views to take into consideration than just being fixated on one proposition.
For me personally, I've never dated and have no interest unless there is a genuine connection. However when I do get approached by men I notice the differences in the way they try to woo. One man doesn't want a relationship at all, he just wants to be friends with benefits. Another man asks what's my name, where I'm going, where do I live and what's my number, which are all red flags. Another man calls me a pretty young thing and says I don't have to work and he'll take care of me, but that's not the kind of person I am nor want to be treated like a trophy than a human being, and as Princess Jasmine said, "I'm not a prize to be won." Another man asked if I was single and tried to woo me but after rejection he just told me that I'll regret turning down a man that might have been the one. Sounds like another major red flag and manipulator as I was young too then and he much older. Another man who was the most polite and respectful asked for my number but I declined, at the time; I just wanted to focus on my terminally ill mother, so bad timing plus I thought originally from afar he looked like my dad by the way he dressed but not looked. Another man told me he knew I was lonely and then went on about his whole dating life about how he's so tired of these beautiful girls using and hurting him. Did he really think I lacked self-respect to allow him to basically call me ugly and then proceed that I'm last on his list because he is the one who is in fact lonely and miserable?
Teens learn from a young age that they can use their bodies to get what they want because the world has many weak people and those people always go through issues like that because they are superficial just like the beautiful women or men they want . Of course being beautiful doesn't mean one is superficial but it is rare to find one who is not influenced by the world.
Another man was an undercover gay. Another man tried to impress me by pulling out all of his credit cards...um yeah I'm not that type of woman and that did the exact opposite and didn't impress me at all. If I do end up liking and loving someone it will because of their personality, morals, beliefs, etc, not what they have, how much money they got, and whatever superficial things that don't matter in the end.
Now these are just my personal experiences thus far, mostly bad ones so I can only imagine just how much of this goes on worldwide and that both men and women should have high standards and should never settle. Of course to each their own. I'm happily single and stress free, but if in the future I should meet a man and we're both compatible then sure I would give dating a try. Otherwise it's too many self-centered, controlling and manipulative, superficial men and on the flip side obviously women too.
For me personally, I've never dated and have no interest unless there is a genuine connection. However when I do get approached by men I notice the differences in the way they try to woo. One man doesn't want a relationship at all, he just wants to be friends with benefits. Another man asks what's my name, where I'm going, where do I live and what's my number, which are all red flags. Another man calls me a pretty young thing and says I don't have to work and he'll take care of me, but that's not the kind of person I am nor want to be treated like a trophy than a human being, and as Princess Jasmine said, "I'm not a prize to be won." Another man asked if I was single and tried to woo me but after rejection he just told me that I'll regret turning down a man that might have been the one. Sounds like another major red flag and manipulator as I was young too then and he much older. Another man who was the most polite and respectful asked for my number but I declined, at the time; I just wanted to focus on my terminally ill mother, so bad timing plus I thought originally from afar he looked like my dad by the way he dressed but not looked. Another man told me he knew I was lonely and then went on about his whole dating life about how he's so tired of these beautiful girls using and hurting him. Did he really think I lacked self-respect to allow him to basically call me ugly and then proceed that I'm last on his list because he is the one who is in fact lonely and miserable?
Teens learn from a young age that they can use their bodies to get what they want because the world has many weak people and those people always go through issues like that because they are superficial just like the beautiful women or men they want . Of course being beautiful doesn't mean one is superficial but it is rare to find one who is not influenced by the world.
Another man was an undercover gay. Another man tried to impress me by pulling out all of his credit cards...um yeah I'm not that type of woman and that did the exact opposite and didn't impress me at all. If I do end up liking and loving someone it will because of their personality, morals, beliefs, etc, not what they have, how much money they got, and whatever superficial things that don't matter in the end.
Now these are just my personal experiences thus far, mostly bad ones so I can only imagine just how much of this goes on worldwide and that both men and women should have high standards and should never settle. Of course to each their own. I'm happily single and stress free, but if in the future I should meet a man and we're both compatible then sure I would give dating a try. Otherwise it's too many self-centered, controlling and manipulative, superficial men and on the flip side obviously women too.
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newtypepilot
Member
Madflavor
Member
I think Gen Z might be screwed when they become elderly. The dating scene is fucked right now because a lot of them don't have proper social skills thanks to social media. These kids never had a chance. They were born into social media. Men are more shy than they've ever been, and women's perception on what the ideal man should be is even more unrealistic. On top of that fertility issues are on the rise, and so are the number of young people who are coming out as LGBTQ. I think birth rate amongst Gen Z is going to be staggering low. By far the lowest we've seen in long time. And when these people start growing sick and old, there's going to be a shortage of younger people to take care of them.
When it comes to men finding women for companionship and marriage, unless you're handsome, charismatic or bringing in a lot of money, you have to lower you expectations on a girl's looks. You have to. Average looking women know they're average and they're expectations for an ideal guy are going to be more realistic than the prettier women. A good companion, a stable family, and children, are far more important and rewarding than 1-2 minutes of thrusting into some drunk hot girl who's got a shit personality.
When it comes to men finding women for companionship and marriage, unless you're handsome, charismatic or bringing in a lot of money, you have to lower you expectations on a girl's looks. You have to. Average looking women know they're average and they're expectations for an ideal guy are going to be more realistic than the prettier women. A good companion, a stable family, and children, are far more important and rewarding than 1-2 minutes of thrusting into some drunk hot girl who's got a shit personality.
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It's true that any decent looking girl will get a disproportionate amount of attention on social media now, but as a guy you can jump ahead of a hundred DMs by having good IRL social skills and the balls to approach.
Considering the younger generation purportedly has panic attacks about telephone calls, even passable IRL skills are going to make any average guy look like a Chad
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Fuz
Banned
Pics or didn't happen.
InterMusketeer
Member
Dating seems pretty hard nowadays, but the men interviewed for this article all seem to want casual flings but somehow end up on dates with women who're looking for a more serious relationship. That should be pretty easy to filter out from the start, no?
To be honest it is exactly a job interview. Especially when you're looking for "the one" to settle down with. What can you offer. What can she offer? But yes the current dating scene is pretty bad and social media has warped women's perceptions drastically. I don't know why some women thing they're god's gift to earth when they look more like a gift to Doritos.
Based.
FunkMiller
Gold Member
Get your shit together. Get off your arse, and actually go out and meet women. Yeah, you’ll strike out. But then again, maybe you won’t…
And stop with the ‘casual hook up’ shit. Women don’t want that, and they never fucking have.
Honest to god, young men these days seem like such whiny fucking bitches. Getting a good woman takes effort, patience, and above everything else: good intentions on your part.
And stop with the ‘casual hook up’ shit. Women don’t want that, and they never fucking have.
Honest to god, young men these days seem like such whiny fucking bitches. Getting a good woman takes effort, patience, and above everything else: good intentions on your part.
GutsOfThor
Member
Kevin Samuels was a fuckin treasure. Rest in Power King.
NotMyProblemAnymoreCunt
Gold Member
Yeah no thanks
MGTOW is a thing for a reason
MGTOW is a thing for a reason
INC
Member
Online dating is purely stacked in the woman's favor
I have a lot of girl mates, ranging from average looking, to stunning looking, all get the same result using dating apps like tinder etc etc, they can start a new account and have 100s of likes within a day, and therefore abundance of choice.
It's not the same the other way round, from the dudes PoV.
It's a catch 22 when approaching women irl as well, since the line between confident and creep is slim, especially when you add the above situation in context as well I.e abundance of options at their finger tips
I have a lot of girl mates, ranging from average looking, to stunning looking, all get the same result using dating apps like tinder etc etc, they can start a new account and have 100s of likes within a day, and therefore abundance of choice.
It's not the same the other way round, from the dudes PoV.
It's a catch 22 when approaching women irl as well, since the line between confident and creep is slim, especially when you add the above situation in context as well I.e abundance of options at their finger tips
Nobody_Important
“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
Gonna do exactly that next time.
- Good job
- Hate kids
- Love Chinese food
- Average dick size
- Love music
- Plays video games
- Good cook
- Willing to do the dishes
- Hate doing laundry
Now.... *Stares at her*
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Walter Matthau
Member
If 63% of men under 30 report being single, wouldn't it be a somewhat similar % for women or are they all dating the elderly?
Pejo
Member
I couldn't find the graph, but essentially on dating apps at lest, the top 5% of the men are banging the top 20% of the women or something. This was a Tinder metric, so it was less about relationships than just banging, but you'd have to assume that the data extrapolates from there and there are probably dudes with 2-3 girlfriends who may or may not know about each other.
ReBurn
Gold Member
People don't meet any more
Hip Hop
Member
What the fuck can a 30 year old guy do besides walking around colleges trying to date girls 10 years younger than me and I also don't want to go to a bar as that is also like Tinder and apps in culture imo, lots of hookups happening that I don't want
Im ready to start going to church tbh maybe someone there?
Nobody_Important
“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
It's never been "even" between genders. It's always come down to looks, money, and physical build. For both genders obviously , but moreso in favor of the woman in recent decades. The idea that there was ever a time where the genders were equal when it comes to dating and relationships in general is a myth.
This is obviously ignoring the dark ages of society when women were little more than objects and property. Men were clearly in charge at that time to the detriment of women. Luckily we have moved on from that.
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Winter John
Gold Member
We had to get a new babysitter because our last one moved. We eventually found a girl who seemed cool so I went to meet her and she goes where's your wife and kid? I said I didn't bring those cock blockers
-Minsc-
Member
Having left porn consumption behind I can say what you wrote sounds very similar to porn addiction. And endless pool of potential mates to overload our brain. At the end of the day they remain nothing more than potential.Definitely not.
The internet now allows folks to troll through the largest dating pool possible for the most superficial characteristics imaginable. If all you are doing is basing your dating on "swipe right/left" and filters exist only to bias that decision, no wonder the dating scene has gone to shit. Used to be dating site profiles FORCED you to fill out shit like "do you want kids" etc so the long term relationship hunters (the primary focus of these sites back in the day) could properly vet partners. Now it seems like hook-up culture has thoroughly invaded these sites to the point where "meat market" is a totally apt description. Actually cold approaching someone with romantic intent is virtually assault these days
I went to church and now I'm married.What the fuck can a 30 year old guy do besides walking around colleges trying to date girls 10 years younger than me and I also don't want to go to a bar as that is also like Tinder and apps in culture imo, lots of hookups happening that I don't want
Im ready to start going to church tbh maybe someone there?
Dirk Benedict
Gold Member
This. The masses, having been locked in for so long... all that junk in front of their faces. It's not even the good internet, where it was once an unfiltered wild-west type deal.
It's monetized, gatekept, ideological and moraless in a dark way.
I remember Nerd being an insult and being called one for simply owning an Nintendo.
Now, insanely hot girls refer to themselves as nerds simply for being into marvel/anime/disney/video games.
There were barely any hot fucking nerds back in the day, if any, and by back in the day, I mean let's rewind the clocks back to the 80s.
Also... fuck Vibes. I feel this generation is grabbing a hold of anything that was awesome in the past and straight ruining it... but, that is for another topic.
StylishMGTOW
Member
Shouldn't these numbers tell us something, then? Which is, not to base your dating prospects on dating apps?
Human beings, both men and women, always had these preferences even before the advent of the internet, but somehow we still found a way to pro-create. Technology only shone the light on our nature.
So I believe the problem isn't necessarily women in the dating pool, as much as it is technology broadcasting our worst traits and putting into stone, so to speak. It reinforces our negatives beliefs on the opposite sex, giving fuel to the flame.
Technology is the problem.
Human beings, both men and women, always had these preferences even before the advent of the internet, but somehow we still found a way to pro-create. Technology only shone the light on our nature.
So I believe the problem isn't necessarily women in the dating pool, as much as it is technology broadcasting our worst traits and putting into stone, so to speak. It reinforces our negatives beliefs on the opposite sex, giving fuel to the flame.
Technology is the problem.
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Darkmakaimura
Member
My appearance and intelligence and personality makes it more like winning a lottery to me.
I gave up. I don't bother with trying to pick up on women anymore or anything like that and I have no interest to either. I already have too much on my plate and I would be too much of a burden.
I don't think I'll ever have a girlfriend or date again but I'm okay with that.
I gave up. I don't bother with trying to pick up on women anymore or anything like that and I have no interest to either. I already have too much on my plate and I would be too much of a burden.
I don't think I'll ever have a girlfriend or date again but I'm okay with that.
Tams
Member
Then she should just fucking say that. If she can't help but blurt out about kids, then she's can say 'I'm looking for a long term relationship'.
But alas, many women tend to not be direct and a fair few men oblivious. The difference is that there former can be quite easily fixed, but the latter not.
PSYGN
Member
I know it's anecdotal but I find it made men more hateful than women. They have communities around this strange/hateful/perverse view of women, it's weird.
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My niece (24yr old) now asks for credit score while on the first date.
The way people in the US talk about credit score now amazes me. It comes up in so many conversations.
El Pistolero
Banned
yeah, I work with a few women who are currently single because of their lofty expectations.
The funny thing is, they don't give a fuck - they'd rather be single than to set realistic dating standards for themselves.
I see a lot of lonely people coming in the next 10-20 years+ .
They'll regret it when they are in their fifties and surrounded by their army of cats.
Even back in the day, young men would go sign up to fight in wars on the other side of the world to make their name, have a chance at status and fortune, or die trying, so that they could get established and therefore marry. It’s never been easy for men. The ones in power were a tiny minority.
This is our lot in life. At least we have an unprecedented level of agency and opportunity in the modern world.
JimmyRustler
Gold Member
What I find disheartening is hardly anyone seems to be looking for emotional connection and/or someone you actually end up caring about. It's just about what he or she can give to you. Be it money, status or sex. I do sometimes envy many people for being like this as it's so much easier to find someone in general.
Dirk Benedict
Gold Member
Do you believe this? Men will always own the entire shit, and by that? I mean, everything. They are the ones permitting this to happen....
Darkmakaimura
Member
I'm actually so happy that I don't care anymore. It's a huge weight off my back.
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