Had a pretty shit day; broke things off with this girl i'd been seeing for some time now. We've been in a pretty rough patch lately and today everything kinda hit a wall, so to speak.
She told me Monday she had the next three days pretty much free. So.. Yesterday I brought over some roses in a vase as like, sorry for the difficulty? Talked and cuddled for a bit but she had some meeting for the convention shes staff on and wanted to clean the apartment or something so I took off, said we could hang out later. Never did - she was feeling stressed and worked early today anyways. So okay. Picked her up at 2, was a perfect day out. Asked if she wanted to go to a nice park downtown, said we could bring her dog. She wanted to shave quick, so sat down on the couch and then she starts checking her Twitter and tumblr and after a bit I'm like.. Weren't you gonna shave?
Well, then she was tired from work so.. Laid around until like 3:30. She started moving, asked if she was awake. Said "No, if you wanna go you can go".. So I didn't say anything, looks at me and asks why I look upset. Tells me I can go again so I get up and leave. Got a call after I get home asking why I'm so mad. Turns into arguing. Told her I wanna break up. She says "over the phone?" So I end up going back over to do it in person.
On top of all that she didn't have that meeting last night. Guess that was actually today. She said that was we got to her place originally and I asked if I'll see her later. Said "depends how late it goes" then later on when I came back to break up in person she's saying she was just gonna bring her laptop over.. Also a co-worker died and that's why she was stressed. I had no idea cause she never told me. Apparently that was on her twitter. :|
If a girl says "if you wanna go, you can go," leaving is
never the right answer.
To be honest, throughout this post, you sound really emotionally insensitive. Obviously, she's not exactly a champ at disclosing what's on her mind either, but she was dropping signs left and right. I'm just gonna drop some questions and maybe it'll spur some thought.
If you knew things were spotty and she blocked three days to spend time with you, why would you leave instead of make more time for her and, maybe, help her clean her apartment?
When you returned the following day, after knowing that she was already stressed, why did you criticize her slowness in leaving her place?
Again, you were giving off signs of agitation or annoyance (our partners can read this in us pretty easily), which prompted her to ask why you were angry. What did you say in response? And then, why did you go?
How do you go from bringing over roses one day and wanting to break up the next?
Why do you think she didn't open up to you about a major stressor in her life like her co-worker dying?
I couldn't follow your last paragraph, because it doesn't really make much sense. You tell her over the phone that you want to break up, then you're unsure as to when her meeting is, but you ask if you'll see her later (after telling her that you want to end things), and then you visit her place and dump her in person?
This is only from one post, and I'm sure that there were other difficulties in your relationship, but it sounds like you ignored her feelings, were oblivious to signs she was dropping, didn't make her feel comfortable enough to open up to you, and were quick to retreat whenever something inconvenient happened. Basically, these are the hallmarks of not being ready for a real relationship. So maybe that's it.
