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Dating-Age |OT5| Halp me pls. In the bathroom.

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gwailo

Banned
It sounds more like a bored dumb teenager (like really young) trying to pretend they're older. For some reason they always pick 19 as their age. I would personally block and move on, nothing good is going to come of it.

I dunno if I buy this is just pity hangouts and pity blowjobs. Because I aint never met a girl who would blow me every week just because I was sad (lawd I wish).

Yeah that seems pretty suspect to me as well, I mean maybe once or twice, but a weekly scheduled meetup is odd. But some women do get pleasure out of giving oral and if she is submissive in the S & M sense, that may play a factor in that. She has a high stress job where she takes command a lot but the BJ meetups are a point where she allows herself to not be in control. I dunno.
 

Az987

all good things
Well, the general point still remains. Perhaps you're not still hung up on your ex, but your tempo is off. Perhaps if you give yourself some more time to move past past relationships, you end up finding that you've kept some feelings hidden somewhere. Some time without other dates, without people that you get a connection with will create that time. It's like you need the distraction of having someone something is going on with. In response to you asking why things go the same way repeatedly, the best advice I have is to not date for a month, at least.

Yeah I see what you're saying and honestly, I think its because I just jump into relationships. I click with most of the women that I've gone on dates with, there is usually always chemistry so I tend to let it take over and say, "Ok, found her!" and literally get in a relationship with the first woman I go out with after a break up, practically.

So this time I'm going to take my time, see what's out there and not rush a relationship. Plus I got ahead of myself and some of those dates are going to fall through more than likely lol.

Like there's one woman I've been on 3 dates with already and the chemistry is great, because I flirt so much and I feel most at ease around a woman. So where some people can just go off if the chemistry is right and they have things in common, I really can't and I'm starting to see that I can't just shack up with someone becsuse we click.
 
The girl needs to be honest with her friend. It's probably inevitable that he wanted to make their relationship more substantial. He's still stinging from the breakup with his fiancé (what was the timeframe between the breakup and pity blowjobs?) and he has someone coming over on a schedule to give him oral. If she doesn't want anything more, she needs to bring this up, even if it might affect the friendship.

Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

I know a bit about her dating history, and she is very much the type to have FWB relationships with people and develop no real attachment to them. It sounds like situation with Wednesday both took her by surprise & is a bit unwelcome. As for the weekly meetups, thats more because it was consistent & okay action, although he's not good at actual sex hence shy she sticks to oral with him. She's a very giving person so her wanting to help a guy get over something is totally within the character of person I have gotten to know. Heck, not to long ago, she almost screwed a mutual friend (this is prior to us getting involved) simply because it has been quite awhile for said friend and he could really use it to get out of his funk. Also, i'm the first guy that she's met in years that is genuinely into deeper BDSM play, which she has neither had in years & is DESPERATELY missing out on. Wednesday dude isn't into that stuff either.

I haven't spoken to her this morning yet - she's a night shift nurse & sleeps during the day, so she's probably catchin up on some sleep right now before her shift in a few hours. We're supposed to hang out tomorrow morning & talk & whatnot. I'll keep you guys updated.
 
You are being lead on.
And you deserve it, since you think she is "the dumbest person" ever.

*Led on

Sorry, had to.

Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

*looks at thread title*

We've come full circle.
 

gwailo

Banned
Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

I know a bit about her dating history, and she is very much the type to have FWB relationships with people and develop no real attachment to them. It sounds like situation with Wednesday both took her by surprise & is a bit unwelcome. As for the weekly meetups, thats more because it was consistent & okay action, although he's not good at actual sex hence shy she sticks to oral with him. She's a very giving person so her wanting to help a guy get over something is totally within the character of person I have gotten to know. Heck, not to long ago, she almost screwed a mutual friend (this is prior to us getting involved) simply because it has been quite awhile for said friend and he could really use it to get out of his funk. Also, i'm the first guy that she's met in years that is genuinely into deeper BDSM play, which she has neither had in years & is DESPERATELY missing out on. Wednesday dude isn't into that stuff either.

I haven't spoken to her this morning yet - she's a night shift nurse & sleeps during the day, so she's probably catchin up on some sleep right now before her shift in a few hours. We're supposed to hang out tomorrow morning & talk & whatnot. I'll keep you guys updated.

The arrangement with her friend will not work. He has already demonstrated that he wants more and giving him the bone of occasional "dates" is not going to change his mind. He is obviously in a relationship mindset and would rather have that than a FWB. It's ok for the girl to set boundaries with this guy and say "no". I think in the world of kink (or kink minded people) that saying no may come off as being a square/prude, but it is perfectly fine in this instance and probably necessary for this guy to fully recover from the breakup with his fiancé.
 

WolfeTone

Member
Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

I know a bit about her dating history, and she is very much the type to have FWB relationships with people and develop no real attachment to them. It sounds like situation with Wednesday both took her by surprise & is a bit unwelcome. As for the weekly meetups, thats more because it was consistent & okay action, although he's not good at actual sex hence shy she sticks to oral with him. She's a very giving person so her wanting to help a guy get over something is totally within the character of person I have gotten to know. Heck, not to long ago, she almost screwed a mutual friend (this is prior to us getting involved) simply because it has been quite awhile for said friend and he could really use it to get out of his funk. Also, i'm the first guy that she's met in years that is genuinely into deeper BDSM play, which she has neither had in years & is DESPERATELY missing out on. Wednesday dude isn't into that stuff either.

I haven't spoken to her this morning yet - she's a night shift nurse & sleeps during the day, so she's probably catchin up on some sleep right now before her shift in a few hours. We're supposed to hang out tomorrow morning & talk & whatnot. I'll keep you guys updated.

If what she says is true, it sounds like she has the situation under control. Some people are good at keeping their FWB situations under control. It doesn't sounds like she has any feelings for this guy beyond that of a concerned friend. You have little to worry about so long as you trust that what she has told you about the situation is honest.

If this guy is super into her, then she'll have to end things with him, but that is entirely out of your control.
 
So please, make fun of me, make a lot a fun. I need to be made fun of for, so I don't ever repeat this mistake with anyone else. I may be one of the few heterossexual, single guys, who refused sex and ended up fucking up his chances with a very pretty, amazing girl at the same time.

I'm late to this one, but I wanted to relate my own story of similar circumstance. A few years back I had been lightly chatting with a girl on OKC, when she suddenly asked me out for that evening. We met up, had a crazy good time, were making out in the park downtown when she told me she was debating whether to take me home with her. I, of course, was so sure that this was going somewhere meaningful that I said there's no rush, and eventually we parted ways for the night. I never saw her again, despite a few attempts at another date. In hindsight, yeah I wish I had gone home with her because man she was hot, and it's probable she was just looking for a hookup anyway. But I don't question myself over the decision I made in the moment, which for me was the right one. Sometimes shit happens and you go damn, if only I knew.

Still, I really wish I fucked her. :(
 

gaiages

Banned
I assumed every blowjob was a pity blowjob.

Oh man



EDIT: I hate you phone GAF
 

Septimius

Junior Member
Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

I know a bit about her dating history, and she is very much the type to have FWB relationships with people and develop no real attachment to them. It sounds like situation with Wednesday both took her by surprise & is a bit unwelcome. As for the weekly meetups, thats more because it was consistent & okay action, although he's not good at actual sex hence shy she sticks to oral with him. She's a very giving person so her wanting to help a guy get over something is totally within the character of person I have gotten to know. Heck, not to long ago, she almost screwed a mutual friend (this is prior to us getting involved) simply because it has been quite awhile for said friend and he could really use it to get out of his funk. Also, i'm the first guy that she's met in years that is genuinely into deeper BDSM play, which she has neither had in years & is DESPERATELY missing out on. Wednesday dude isn't into that stuff either.

I haven't spoken to her this morning yet - she's a night shift nurse & sleeps during the day, so she's probably catchin up on some sleep right now before her shift in a few hours. We're supposed to hang out tomorrow morning & talk & whatnot. I'll keep you guys updated.

I have no idea what's going on, but I'm getting to the age where this sets of a red flag, the way she deals with this other person. It sounds like it'll be a lot of drama with her.
 

Scotch

Member
I have no idea what's going on, but I'm getting to the age where this sets of a red flag, the way she deals with this other person. It sounds like it'll be a lot of drama with her.
Yep, same. Especially the "allow him to take her on ocassional dates" part. And then sneaking to the bathroom to text with you?

If she doesn't want to date the guy she should say so. If she wants the guy to leave she should say so. Instead she's texting you behind his back. "Boohoo this guy I'm blowing evey week is developing feeling for me and won't leave."
 
Update: She proceeded to keep sneaking away to text me. He got drunk & spent the night. She basically explained that she told him she has no interest in anything serious, that she is currently seeing other people that she really wants to explore things with, but that she'll allow him to take her out on dates occasionally. Then she proceeded to tell me how badly she wished he would just leave so she could just talk to me. She kept going to the bathroom to text me or wishing that it was me there instead of him.

I know a bit about her dating history, and she is very much the type to have FWB relationships with people and develop no real attachment to them. It sounds like situation with Wednesday both took her by surprise & is a bit unwelcome. As for the weekly meetups, thats more because it was consistent & okay action, although he's not good at actual sex hence shy she sticks to oral with him. She's a very giving person so her wanting to help a guy get over something is totally within the character of person I have gotten to know. Heck, not to long ago, she almost screwed a mutual friend (this is prior to us getting involved) simply because it has been quite awhile for said friend and he could really use it to get out of his funk. Also, i'm the first guy that she's met in years that is genuinely into deeper BDSM play, which she has neither had in years & is DESPERATELY missing out on. Wednesday dude isn't into that stuff either.

I haven't spoken to her this morning yet - she's a night shift nurse & sleeps during the day, so she's probably catchin up on some sleep right now before her shift in a few hours. We're supposed to hang out tomorrow morning & talk & whatnot. I'll keep you guys updated.

I hope you recognized that this reads like garbage. I'll explain why. It's because that is entirely what this situation is. This girl is not a good person. What she is doing (if you are describing it as is and she is totally forthcoming (which is doubtful)) is not noble, it's not selfless and it's not giving.

I don't understand how the fuck you could type this out and see no issue. The flag is red man.
 

gaiages

Banned
I can't afford any of that, I'm homeless lol.

I think dating is the least of your worries right now.

I hope you recognized that this reads like garbage. I'll explain why. It's because that is entirely what this situation is. This girl is not a good person. What she is doing (if you are describing it as is and she is totally forthcoming (which is doubtful)) is not noble, it's not selfless and it's not giving.

I don't understand how the fuck you could type this out and see no issue. The flag is red man.

Yep. That's just a huge drama explosion waiting to happen.
 

Salamando

Member
If I'm reading that right, poster and girl haven't been on a date yet, and the girl is liveblogging her date with another guy to him. The hell? "You're not exclusive until you are" is one thing, but I'd never tell a girl about the other girls I'm dating, let alone tell them exactly what I'm doing with them, and certainly wouldn't tell them what's happening while it's happening!
 

gaiages

Banned
If I'm reading that right, poster and girl haven't been on a date yet, and the girl is liveblogging her date with another guy to him. The hell? "You're not exclusive until you are" is one thing, but I'd never tell a girl about the other girls I'm dating, let alone tell them exactly what I'm doing with them, and certainly wouldn't tell them what's happening while it's happening!

Let's not forget pity blowjobs on a weekly schedule and pity dates
 
Went on a date with a girl on Monday and I thought it went well, but she didn't reply the next day when I texted her and said I had a good time and hoped we could meet up again next week. Not particularly bothered, but it's annoying because we had an actual discussion about how irritating it is when a date ghosts you after. Whatever, I have another date tomorrow so she's already out of my mind.

If I'm reading that right, poster and girl haven't been on a date yet, and the girl is liveblogging her date with another guy to him. The hell? "You're not exclusive until you are" is one thing, but I'd never tell a girl about the other girls I'm dating, let alone tell them exactly what I'm doing with them, and certainly wouldn't tell them what's happening while it's happening!

Could be another kink the girl is into. Seems like her relationship with the poster is primarily fetish-based right now and she could be testing the waters to see if he's into open relationships or gets turned on by similar kinks.
 

Septimius

Junior Member
Let's not forget pity blowjobs on a weekly schedule and pity dates

"Pity" dates. "She's a really nice person who just wants to help out". No, she's a bad person that craves attention and validation and gets it by any means necessary. Without even reading what happened I could smell the red flag. Getting deeper into it, I can only say one thing:

Bail. Hard.

Could be another kink the girl is into. Seems like her relationship with the poster is primarily fetish-based right now and she could be testing the waters to see if he's into open relationships or gets turned on by similar kinks.

No. She's being dishonest and flippant.
 

Salamando

Member
Let's not forget pity blowjobs on a weekly schedule and pity dates
Oh I didn't forget, I was just willing to write it off as "girl likes sex". Although we've been calling them "pity blowjobs", Sneakers just called it Oral. I like to think girl got hers too.
Could be another kink the girl is into. Seems like her relationship with the poster is primarily fetish-based right now and she could be testing the waters to see if he's into open relationships or gets turned on by similar kinks.
I think it's more likely that the girl read Sneakers' initial tepid response, and reacted by trying to make him jealous and competitive. If this were responsible kink, they would have talked about it first, and Sneakers wouldn't be caught so off guard by it.
 
No. She's being dishonest and flippant.

I don't think she's being intentionally dishonest. But she definitely strikes me as a person who will not be happy in a sexually monogamous relationship. Especially since instead of her giving a hard "no, we're done because I'm not romantically interested in you" to pity blowjob guy, she instead went with "I'll allow you to take me on dates but we are in no way romantically exclusive." And that presumably will still include the oral.

So my advice would be to not devote too much time to her if you're expecting a monogamous relationship. That's only going to end in frustration and/or heartbreak.

I think it's more likely that the girl read Sneakers' initial tepid response, and reacted by trying to make him jealous and competitive. If this were responsible kink, they would have talked about it first, and Sneakers wouldn't be caught so off guard by it.

He did say it's been a while since she was really with somebody that shared their fetish, so it could be just her awkward way of testing boundaries. But yeah, it's irresponsible of her on most levels. She could be fun but I don't think Sneakers should invest too much time in her. The whole idea of spinning off her hooking up with other dudes as "She's a giving person! Really!" is only going to end badly if you don't have a very, very open mindset.
 

Oblivion

Fetishing muscular manly men in skintight hosery
Good news, folks. After months and months with no luck getting any dates, I have two lined up within the next few days.

I have a question for y'all, though. As has been normally the case, I met these chicks on OKC. They're willing to meet up but they don't seem super engaged when chatting. Have any of you had any dates where people didn't seem too interested online, but were really engaged/lively when you met up?
 

bluethree

Member
Good news, folks. After months and months with no luck getting any dates, I have two lined up within the next few days.

I have a question for y'all, though. As has been normally the case, I met these chicks on OKC. They're willing to meet up but they don't seem super engaged when chatting. Have any of you had any dates where people didn't seem too interested online, but were really engaged/lively when you met up?

plenty! don't worry about it, people can be very different when it comes to texting and real conversation.
 

Salamando

Member
Good news, folks. After months and months with no luck getting any dates, I have two lined up within the next few days.

I have a question for y'all, though. As has been normally the case, I met these chicks on OKC. They're willing to meet up but they don't seem super engaged when chatting. Have any of you had any dates where people didn't seem too interested online, but were really engaged/lively when you met up?

I've been on dates where everything was right for a perfect date (until it was the worst) and dates where there was no logical reason for it to work, except it did. The first meet tells you more about a person than months of messaging.
 
Good news, folks. After months and months with no luck getting any dates, I have two lined up within the next few days.

I have a question for y'all, though. As has been normally the case, I met these chicks on OKC. They're willing to meet up but they don't seem super engaged when chatting. Have any of you had any dates where people didn't seem too interested online, but were really engaged/lively when you met up?

Some people are just naturally better at face-to-face conversation. I'm a writer so I'm always better at the initial chatting, but don't take affront if the people you're talking to don't seem super interested - the fact that replied at all and they're agreeing to meet up means they have some interest.
 
Dating GAF. Currently hitting me up tinder, getting QUITE a few matches, but my conversations go one to two replies max and they bottom out. Not sure what I'm doing wrong. Have this one girl who, after saying what's up, "oh you actually read my profile! I didn't know people did that" and I just said that's what it's there for! And she replied with a short that's true kinda text. Thinking of just going straight in next for a "want to go on an adventure or soemthing?"

I suck at this. :<
 
Yeah but replying to a wall sucks. Three word replies are kinda shitty. And then dropping replies after one is worse. .-.

Well looks like I'm going bowling. One "yes" is still a "yes"
 

Az987

all good things
Ugh... hmm... this is an odd one..

So I met this young woman off tinder and it turned out she was on catfish and dr Phil... I actually vaguely recall seeing the dr Phil episode...

And she's kind of like, well... nuts... And I thought she was hilarious and suddenly I'm in like 30 of her Instagram selfies... I was drinking so I was like yeah sure, selfies, whatever and I go her page snd I'm like literally half her posts lol

I don't even have that many pictures of myself on my own Instagram.

The second to last one says i luv Adam.

Oh shit, what did I get myself into?

Most hilarious first date ever.
 

Palpable

Member
I have been having the absolute worst luck with women... for a long while now. I'm not sure if it's the way I look or my interactions with women. Oddly enough, women I find attractive I can't seem to talk to as easily as I talk to ones I don't. I used to be very shy as a kid. I mostly grew out of that, but I still have trouble talking to girls. What's worse is that my face gets super red when I get nervous. This no doubt fucks me over. Tinder has been barren for me lately, too. I'm going to partially blame that on my location (Vegas) as there are a lot of superficial women and transients here. I'm not saying there aren't normal, genuine ladies around, but it's hard to deny that this city doesn't harbor a shit ton of fake/superficial women.

Anyway, here are 3 photos I have on my profile (I have a few more of myself with friends too). What am I doing wrong? I've always been more on the "quiet" side, but when on dates, women tell me I keep the conversation going better than most guys they're out with, so I don't think that's the problem.

Ugh... hmm... this is an odd one..

So I met this young woman off tinder and it turned out she was on catfish and dr Phil... I actually vaguely recall seeing the dr Phil episode...

And she's kind of like, well... nuts... And I thought she was hilarious and suddenly I'm in like 30 of her Instagram selfies... I was drinking so I was like yeah sure, selfies, whatever and I go her page snd I'm like literally half her posts lol

I don't even have that many pictures of myself on my own Instagram.

The second to last one says i luv Adam.

Oh shit, what did I get myself into?

Most hilarious first date ever.

You're already dead.
 
Dating GAF. Currently hitting me up tinder, getting QUITE a few matches, but my conversations go one to two replies max and they bottom out. Not sure what I'm doing wrong. Have this one girl who, after saying what's up, "oh you actually read my profile! I didn't know people did that" and I just said that's what it's there for! And she replied with a short that's true kinda text. Thinking of just going straight in next for a "want to go on an adventure or soemthing?"

I suck at this. :<
Ask about things they like. My first question when things start slowing is "What are some of your favorite bands?" but if they mention they're a movie fan or "Netflix junkie" in their profile, ask about those. These are people with interests. You need to take the initiative to find them out to get the ball rolling. Girls get shitloads of guys messaging them. If you respond with "haha yeah" to something they say and don't give her something to respond to, she won't bother with you because she's getting messaged by someone more interesting. Don't be nervous. Be confident. What's the worst that'll happen in a text conversation?
 

Septimius

Junior Member
Ugh... hmm... this is an odd one..

So I met this young woman off tinder and it turned out she was on catfish and dr Phil... I actually vaguely recall seeing the dr Phil episode...

And she's kind of like, well... nuts... And I thought she was hilarious and suddenly I'm in like 30 of her Instagram selfies... I was drinking so I was like yeah sure, selfies, whatever and I go her page snd I'm like literally half her posts lol

I don't even have that many pictures of myself on my own Instagram.

The second to last one says i luv Adam.

Oh shit, what did I get myself into?

Most hilarious first date ever.

You do realize my advice was to stop dating a while? I'm giving you that advice because you asked why patterns kept repeating, and all of this is exactly why. I'm not gonna give the same advice again.
 

vern

Member
I have been having the absolute worst luck with women... for a long while now. I'm not sure if it's the way I look or my interactions with women. Oddly enough, women I find attractive I can't seem to talk to as easily as I talk to ones I don't. I used to be very shy as a kid. I mostly grew out of that, but I still have trouble talking to girls. What's worse is that my face gets super red when I get nervous. This no doubt fucks me over. Tinder has been barren for me lately, too. I'm going to partially blame that on my location (Vegas) as there are a lot of superficial women and transients here. I'm not saying there aren't normal, genuine ladies around, but it's hard to deny that this city doesn't harbor a shit ton of fake/superficial women.

Anyway, here are 3 photos I have on my profile (I have a few more of myself with friends too). What am I doing wrong? I've always been more on the "quiet" side, but when on dates, women tell me I keep the conversation going better than most guys they're out with, so I don't think that's the problem.



You're already dead.

Honestly your pictures look like you are trying hard to be cool, first two anyway. More chill would be better IMO. Also I'd get rid of gun pics unless you are attempting to attract redneck girls...Third one would probably be better if it was higher quality, it's pretty blurry and your eyes are all shiny and shit. I also get super red so I feel you there. Actually I'm always red.. it sucks.

Ugh... hmm... this is an odd one..

So I met this young woman off tinder and it turned out she was on catfish and dr Phil... I actually vaguely recall seeing the dr Phil episode...

And she's kind of like, well... nuts... And I thought she was hilarious and suddenly I'm in like 30 of her Instagram selfies... I was drinking so I was like yeah sure, selfies, whatever and I go her page snd I'm like literally half her posts lol

I don't even have that many pictures of myself on my own Instagram.

The second to last one says i luv Adam.

Oh shit, what did I get myself into?

Most hilarious first date ever.

First of you should link to the Dr. Phil episode. Second, I always tell my dates when they start taking selfies with me that it doesn't go on social media without my approval. They say "why, are you ashamed or hiding me?" I say "No, it's just a first date and I don't need my whole life broadcast to the world," or some similar type of thing. Fuck that shit if a girl is gonna post photos of you guys. That's lame as hell. Tell her to delete them or at least untag you if tagged. The "I love you" shit needs to go.
 

Palpable

Member
Honestly your pictures look like you are trying hard to be cool, first two anyway. More chill would be better IMO. Also I'd get rid of gun pics unless you are attempting to attract redneck girls...Third one would probably be better if it was higher quality, it's pretty blurry and your eyes are all shiny and shit. I also get super red so I feel you there. Actually I'm always red.. it sucks.

First picture I didn't know was even being taken. I was shooting clay targets. 2nd one was a photoshoot my friend wanted to do to hone his skills and use his new camera. 3rd I just don't have a good quality version of, but I do like it. Honestly I'm not trying to 'look cool' in any of them. I just think they're decent photos of myself (I'm not photogenic).
 

vern

Member
First picture I didn't know was even being taken. I was shooting clay targets. 2nd one was a photoshoot my friend wanted to do to hone his skills and use his new camera. 3rd I just don't have a good quality version of, but I do like it. Honestly I'm not trying to 'look cool' in any of them. I just think they're decent photos of myself (I'm not photogenic).

Maybe not trying but that's the vibe I get lol. Nothing more normal? How are the group ones you mentioned?

Edit: To expand a bit, when people pose with guns it's usually in my experience to look like some kind of badass. Shooting clay targets is pretty innocent and if it's your hobby and you wanna attract girls that are also into that (or at least not opposed to it) then keep it. But I think posing with guns, and in front of your car in a suit, makes you look like a teenager trying to be cool. People in high school used to stand in front of their car and take photos. I don't know your age but the pics chosen make you seem more younger and less mature than you potentially are.

Just one mans opinion is all.
 

Palpable

Member
Maybe not trying but that's the vibe I get lol. Nothing more normal? How are the group ones you mentioned?

Edit: To expand a bit, when people pose with guns it's usually in my experience to look like some kind of badass. Shooting clay targets is pretty innocent and if it's your hobby and you wanna attract girls that are also into that (or at least not opposed to it) then keep it. But I think posing with guns, and in front of your car in a suit, makes you look like a teenager trying to be cool. People in high school used to stand in front of their car and take photos. I don't know your age but the pics chosen make you seem more younger and less mature than you potentially are.

Just one mans opinion is all.

I understand. I need better photos taken, then. I like guns is all. I know posing with guns is dumb looking, but that one is candid. I can see what you mean about the suit/car thing. Those 3 pictures are all about 8 months apart, too. I'm in my mid 20s. I just rarely have pictures taken and most the ones that are taken suck (imo)! Also, I refuse to take selfies (unless it's with a dog or something). That, to me, is very immature.
 

vern

Member
I understand. I need better photos taken, then. I like guns is all. I know posing with guns is dumb looking, but that one is candid. I can see what you mean about the suit/car thing. Those 3 pictures are all about 8 months apart, too. I'm in my mid 20s. I just rarely have pictures taken and most the ones that are taken suck (imo)! Also, I refuse to take selfies (unless it's with a dog or something). That, to me, is very immature.

Hopefully you can get some better shots, as you said these ones aren't working. You are a good looking guy so you should get some matches with decent pics.
 

Fuchs

Member
Texting is terrible.
She won't even respond to the simplest questions (e.g. what are you reading?) and tells me she forgot to reply when I texted her again, even though we planned to go out coming monday a few days ago.
I'm not going to text her again, till sunday evening at the latest.

For me, it seems she has already changed her mind about the date.
 

vern

Member
Texting is terrible.
She won't even respond to the simplest questions (e.g. what are you reading?) and tells me she forgot to reply when I texted her again, even though we planned to go out coming monday a few days ago.
I'm not going to text her again, till sunday evening at the latest.

For me, it seems she has already changed her mind about the date.

Don't ask boring questions.
 

Fuchs

Member
Don't ask boring questions.

Yeah, I get that. This was just me responding, after she asked me what I was reading, when I told her about what I was doing. I felt like this keeps the conversation going, although it's a terribly boring question.
 

vern

Member
Yeah, I get that. This was just me responding, after she asked me what I was reading, when I told her about what I was doing. I felt like this keeps the conversation going, although it's a terribly boring question.

She asked you what you are reading then you responded by asking what she is reading?

Anyway you are right to back off and not text so much. You've never even met her right? Just wait til you meet. Reconfirm when it's closer. For now swipe and set up dates with other girls.
 
So I've hit a new high. Or low, depending on perspective.

I've recently torn my Achilles tendon, and I've noticed that with crutches comes all of the sympathy, even in online dating.

I joined bumble towards the middle/end of June, and combined with my tinder profile, I've had a crazy number of chats in the past month. In most, I dropped that I was going on vacation (Vegas) last week, and those girls couldn't wait to catch up with me when I got back.

So when I got back Monday, I started cashing in, collecting phone numbers, making plans.

I scheduled 5 dates between Friday (last night) and Tuesday, with another up in the air for sometime next week (pretty much impossible for any day except Wednesday).

1 last night (Friday) - Tinder
1 Saturday night - Bumble, but we originally matched on Tinder
1 Sunday morning/afternoon (the only girl of the 6 I met irl)
1 Sunday evening - Tinder
1 Tuesday evening - Bumble
1 (possible Wednesday) - Bumble

Last night we hung out for 6 hours and made out for the last hour. We already have date 2 scheduled for Thursday. So that gives me 6 dates in 7 days, with a potential for a 7th if I squeeze one in Monday or Wednesday. I think my previous record was 3 in a week.

It obviously sucks for my wallet (spent close to $100 last night, and Sunday morning is already minimum a sunk $75 because we're going to brunch and an event afterward with some of my friends), and I really liked the girl I went out with Friday. Great chemistry, great career, similar intellectual pursuits. Downside is she wants to take a 6 month hiatus next year to just travel the globe for her job. How to you map out a relationship with that on the imminent calender? Is she even looking for something serious with that coming up?

Hard to imagine the weekend getting any better, but my spirits are definitely lifted
 
I'm late to this one, but I wanted to relate my own story of similar circumstance. A few years back I had been lightly chatting with a girl on OKC, when she suddenly asked me out for that evening. We met up, had a crazy good time, were making out in the park downtown when she told me she was debating whether to take me home with her. I, of course, was so sure that this was going somewhere meaningful that I said there's no rush, and eventually we parted ways for the night. I never saw her again, despite a few attempts at another date. In hindsight, yeah I wish I had gone home with her because man she was hot, and it's probable she was just looking for a hookup anyway. But I don't question myself over the decision I made in the moment, which for me was the right one. Sometimes shit happens and you go damn, if only I knew.

Still, I really wish I fucked her. :(

Yeah dude, it's still very frustrating to me. Specially considering it is quite hard to meet girls I have great chemistry + am physical attracted to, so it was quite shitty. It helped a bit that my date last Thursday went well, even though the girl is veeeery different than me, we ended up spending a lot of time together, getting high, and making out a lot. Unfortunately, I don't think there is perpective for a relationship.

Guys, any advice on taking photos for sites like okcupid/Tinder? I feel like I'm losing on a lot of potential matches because I have a single picture, that is quite old and is face only. The issue is that I don't have many pictures, especially full body, and I have no idea how to start taking them. Plus, I'm not really photogenic, taking a good picture is a goddamn nightmare.
 
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