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Dating-Age |OT5| Halp me pls. In the bathroom.

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You've been texting for the whole week, what did you talk about then?

Regardless of her bluntness with her sexual experiences (or just masterbating, I dunno), I don't know why that would suddenly change having a conversation with her.

You didn't mention anything about her than things "deemed unusual as according to social norms" (social norms are boring imo, but that's not the point), so it's a little hard to offer you conversation advice since I don't know what else you actually know about her other than that.

We talked about our work, diet, health. She's a nurse, I work in IT. She's already watched Stranger Things, so we can't watch that together unless she wants to watch it again, but she wants to see Mr. Robot and GOT.
 

vern

Member
Yep. Even our own Vern only dates girls with abnormally large foreheads. We all have our niche, I guess. No crime in passing on those you know you won't be attracted to!

It's just the selfie software app shit that alters their facial structure. In real life they have standard foreheads 😔
 
On tinder, when finally get matched someone. How would you start the conversation / what do you say?

I have a standard line that I use about my pictures if I match with a girl that gives me nothing to work with in her profile. But usually, as mentioned before, I try and find something in her pictures or what she says in her profile to riff off of. You'd be surprised how often girls will respond simply because they're impressed you took an extra twenty seconds to read what they wrote. One of the dates I went on recently happened partially because I was the only guy to recognize the lyrics she put in her profile as song lyrics and not a bad pick-up line.
 

Mory Dunz

Member
Been a complete disaster for the past year since my ex moved away to the UK. Doubled my lifetime numbers thanks to these dating apps. Not bragging because the sex just made me miss her more. Not a bad looking guy despite my thinning hair, who goes to the gym regularly. I'm a Vet which I have to keep to myself because the few women who I told that I was one called me a "baby killer". I'm not a republican, so I get where they are coming from... even though I joined to pay for school.

Luckily, a friend and I realized we having feeling for one another and it's been great so far dating for the past 2 months. However, I can't help but think that I'm forcing it due to her being a friend, and not a random NYC tinder girl. I guess we will see where it goes... She is like a guy in the best ways, but I can't stop comparing her to my ex.

Anyone else feel like they forced a relationship due to pissing of mutual friends if you broke up?

What's this nonsense?
Unless you're actually ashamed for whatever reason, why would you keep that a secret.

And I hope you didn't let that girl get away with that. Or you at least dropped contact with her. No random person gets to say something like that. Whether for being in the military, or anything. Goodness. And don't let them.

Were you even in combat? Or was she just assuming. Regardless, if someone doesn't like it, they should be nothing to you.

Don't say "I have to" keep it a secret. No one's forcing you to do a dang thing. You want to due to some reason. If something is apart of you, have confidence in it and own it.
 

Pabzz

Neo Member
Hi Gaf,

First time posting in this thread, but I wanted an outside opinion on my current relationship with a girl and how I should progress. I met her a couple months back because we happened to be interning in the same city (we are both from different places, but we were staying at the same place) and we started to hit things off when she invited me over to her house (in another state) for the weekend. Nothing happened that weekend but it was really fun as I got to spend a lot of time to get to know her and her family. We didn't have our first kiss till last week, and I have been staying with her at a hotel all week, but we didn't really do anything until last night (the day before we both returned home). It was an amazing night and she is an absolutely amazing girl that I would love to be in a permanent relationship with, but we both go to school in different states and we haven't really talked about how we want to progress from here on out. Should I ask her if we should try having a long distance relationship (I know its not easy)? I am just worried that this was just a summer thing for her, meanwhile I took it as something a lot more serious. How should I proceed? Thank you all for your suggestions.
 
I have a standard line that I use about my pictures if I match with a girl that gives me nothing to work with in her profile. But usually, as mentioned before, I try and find something in her pictures or what she says in her profile to riff off of. You'd be surprised how often girls will respond simply because they're impressed you took an extra twenty seconds to read what they wrote. One of the dates I went on recently happened partially because I was the only guy to recognize the lyrics she put in her profile as song lyrics and not a bad pick-up line.

Pretty much any dating I've done through online means has been due to them actually reading my profile. Pretty much the reason I replied to my current boyfriend was because he asked me about a Stephen King book I was reading (he is also a huge king fan).
 

Mory Dunz

Member
Hi Gaf,

First time posting in this thread, but I wanted an outside opinion on my current relationship with a girl and how I should progress. I met her a couple months back because we happened to be interning in the same city (we are both from different places, but we were staying at the same place) and we started to hit things off when she invited me over to her house (in another state) for the weekend. Nothing happened that weekend but it was really fun as I got to spend a lot of time to get to know her and her family. We didn't have our first kiss till last week, and I have been staying with her at a hotel all week, but we didn't really do anything until last night (the day before we both returned home). It was an amazing night and she is an absolutely amazing girl that I would love to be in a permanent relationship with, but we both go to school in different states and we haven't really talked about how we want to progress from here on out. Should I ask her if we should try having a long distance relationship (I know its not easy)? I am just worried that this was just a summer thing for her, meanwhile I took it as something a lot more serious. How should I proceed? Thank you all for your suggestions.

I don't have any advice, I'm just confused about a few things...

- She invited you to stay the weekend with her and her family? And you weren't in a relationship at that point? It seems like you hadn't known her for long either at that point
- But you didn't actually kiss until a week ago? And are already spending a week in hotel together?

not saying it's wrong, cause if it works it works. I was just surprised. It seemed counter to the usual "order of operations" lol
 

gaiages

Banned
We talked about our work, diet, health. She's a nurse, I work in IT. She's already watched Stranger Things, so we can't watch that together unless she wants to watch it again, but she wants to see Mr. Robot and GOT.

Well, looks like you thought of some things to talk a out, then ;)

There's no magic subject, just talks about whatever comes to mind, barring any crazy shit. I had a guy on the second date tell me "I wouldn't mind trying human once in my life". Don't do that and you're good to go.
 

Azerare

Member
So I've been developing a rapport over the past month with this chick fil a cashier and I'm curious if it's poor judgment to ask her out next time I go. And if I do, how do I approach it.

Defintely a different settings than online or a bar,etc.
 

Salamando

Member
. It was an amazing night and she is an absolutely amazing girl that I would love to be in a permanent relationship with, but we both go to school in different states and we haven't really talked about how we want to progress from here on out. Should I ask her if we should try having a long distance relationship (I know its not easy)? I am just worried that this was just a summer thing for her, meanwhile I took it as something a lot more serious. How should I proceed? Thank you all for your suggestions.
Talking to her would be a good starting point. If you do, there's a chance the relationship could continue. If you don't it won't. During the conversation, a big thing to touch on is the game plan - how often can you meet up, and when can you turn the long distance relationship into a close one.

Think hard if you want a LDR. They're hard at the best of times, moreso if the relationship is still very new when you're starting it.
 

JDHarbs

Member
I might be heading into a LDR soon myself, and wanted to know if anyone with experience has any tips for making it a success until we're reunited.

For those who haven't dove into the online thread recently:

Earlier this summer, I met a girl online right before she left town for an internship so all we could do was text each other until she got back. It lasted 2 months, but I was into her enough to stick with it. The first month went great, we texted for hours almost nightly. The second month slowed way down to almost once a week. She got back in town recently and we've had a couple of pretty great dates so far, but she will be leaving again soon for school. She'll graduate in the spring so when she's back, she's back for good. It's just going to be a long wait until then, and my mind has been going back and forth about pursuing this all summer. It's a rough decision to base on such a small sample size, but I'd hate to lose out on something potentially great just because I couldn't be patient.

We've both known about this for months now, but kept telling ourselves to see it through and try to enjoy what time we had before deciding. My job will be ramping up work over the next couple of weeks while she will be preparing to leave so we'll have less meets than we thought to make a decision. I want to get her thoughts about it the next time I see her, but I don't know if I should wait until our last meet to ask.
 
Back from the date. We went to Chipotle, then went hiking afterwards. After hiking, I drove her home and we talked in the car for an hour. She squeezed my penis from outside my shorts and at one point stuck her hand inside my shorts and underwear to feel my shaft. She said she was on her period and didn't want to have sex, even though she wanted to. I told her on the hike that if we went out in the future, it would have to be 2 or 3 weeks from now since I need to study for my Security + cert. She texted me when I got home and said she had fun. You be the judge GAF.
 

demon

I don't mean to alarm you but you have dogs on your face
Back from the date. We went to Chipotle, then went hiking afterwards. After hiking, I drove her home and we talked in the car for an hour. She squeezed my penis from outside my shorts and at one point stuck her hand inside my shorts and underwear to feel my shaft. She said she was on her period and didn't want to have sex, even though she wanted to. I told her on the hike that if we went out in the future, it would have to be 2 or 3 weeks from now since I need to study for my Security + cert. She texted me when I got home and said she had fun. You be the judge GAF.
She doesn't like you. Cut your losses and move on.
 
Back from the date. We went to Chipotle, then went hiking afterwards. After hiking, I drove her home and we talked in the car for an hour. She squeezed my penis from outside my shorts and at one point stuck her hand inside my shorts and underwear to feel my shaft. She said she was on her period and didn't want to have sex, even though she wanted to. I told her on the hike that if we went out in the future, it would have to be 2 or 3 weeks from now since I need to study for my Security + cert. She texted me when I got home and said she had fun. You be the judge GAF.

You don't have a couple hours in the next 3 weeks to get some?

She doesn't like you. Cut your losses and move on.

Sounds like he doesn't like her all that much. You must be trolling.
 
She doesn't like you. Cut your losses and move on.

Are you being sarcastic or real? I can't tell. Good job.
You don't have a couple hours in the next 3 weeks to get some?



Sounds like he doesn't like her all that much. You must be trolling.

I don't think there is some guarantee that sex would happen anyways. She said she wanted to take things slow when we first started talking on Tinder. I really want to take and pass this cert on the 29th with Legion coming out and I have limited time between work and exercise.

I have some reservations. I'm scared because she revealed her grandfather molested her. She is almost too open about her sex life. She has no filter. It's kind of sexy but horrifying at the same time. I don't view her or any woman as a "whore" or anything, but I am afraid of STD's, even though she says she never had them and was recently tested for HIV.
 

Xun

Member
After 26 years it finally happened last night (and this morning...), although I feel even more conflicted now than I did before.

As I stated before I'm not really looking for a relationship as such, and whilst nothing has been mentioned between us about where things are going I'm afraid of upsetting her. I also feel horrible since I'm not entirely sure if I find her attractive... :/

In any case it's a relief to get it done with since being a virgin felt like a massive burden mentally, but I can't help but feel bad?
Should I feel guilty or just go with the flow?
 
I always show up about 20 minutes early when it's that hot. Gives my body time to regulate back to normal temp. I always have a sweat towel, too. Comes in handy in Bangkok and similar places where it's ridiculously hot.
 

efyu_lemonardo

May I have a cookie?
Well yeah... There's not really another way to do it

I always show up about 20 minutes early when it's that hot. Gives my body time to regulate back to normal temp. I always have a sweat towel, too. Comes in handy in Bangkok and similar places where it's ridiculously hot.

I should do this more, problem is too often I don't seem to care enough to make the effort. Probably means I shouldn't be going on those dates in the first place.

Also: Bangkok is the worst! Add to the heat and humidity the spicy food and it's a recipe for a nightmare.
 

vern

Member
I should do this more, problem is too often I don't seem to care enough to make the effort. Probably means I shouldn't be going on those dates in the first place.

Also: Bangkok is the worst! Add to the heat and humidity the spicy food and it's a recipe for a nightmare.

Nah hot places are the best... Bkk is great! You can always say "it's pretty damn hot, let's just go back to my hotel..." Works like a charm.
 
Really getting tired of every Tinder conversation I have dying. Don't know if I'm taking too long to ask them on a date or what, but it's bothersome that all the girls I talk to seem interested enough to chat but then just stop responding.
 

efyu_lemonardo

May I have a cookie?
Really getting tired of every Tinder conversation I have dying. Don't know if I'm taking too long to ask them on a date or what, but it's bothersome that all the girls I talk to seem interested enough to chat but then just stop responding.

You should try asking for their number (or on a date) sooner. Nothing to lose, really.
 

Jokab

Member
Spent the night at my GF's place. Since she lives with her sister she slept on the couch with me. Didn't have to but did anyway, it's way less comfortable than the bed. She did end up going back to bed because she was too hot, did so without waking me, so I woke up in the middle of the night to an empty couch. Kinda thought that was poor form, don't you wake someone when you switch sleeping places and let them know? Just a nitpick tho.

Then we spent the whole next day with eachother, walking around the lake and then cooking. I even watched the olympics horse jumping with her (snorefest but she's watched footy with me so eh). Feels like things are back to normal, super happy about that. :)
 

NIGHT-

Member
Well, I've been in the lumps lately with dating and missing my ex. But today I met a woman, a chemist with an amazing body whose just gorgeous all around. We met for coffee and conversed really well, laughed and told stories the whole time. She asked if I wanted to do lunch too, so we did. Date ended with a kiss and I asked if she wanted to eat Indian food soon, she said yes and to do improv as well. This is the first date I went on that I didn't think of my ex, I assume cause I find this girl so interesting and just an overall upgrade. I'm nervous, but I hope things end up moving in the right direction!
 

ATF487

Member
Has anyone ever been told "I think we should be friends" and simultaneously 1) is sort of bummed about it and 2) think it's a good idea and something that crossed their mind before?

I think I'm only a bit bummed because she decided to close that door first; it's still rejection, in a way. After a couple of dates I was sort of confused why I wasn't more physically attracted to her, I definitely think she's cute and we have a lot in common, but she is right in that there wasn't much of a romantic spark.
I also declined staying at her place the other night, which might play into this, but I don't think so

Not sure if we will ever get around to hanging out as friends, but it'd be nice to make that transition. Maybe her friend group is cool as well.
 

Mory Dunz

Member
Wait, she invited you over for the night after a date or two, and then said there wasn't a spark?



maybe she thought she was going to be rejected (which....she kinda already was) so tried to get you first.
 

bluethree

Member
Yeah sounds like it. As much as this thread stresses the importance of not being needy, etc, women will absolutely start acting distant if they think you're not that interested in them, especially sexually. Even if you show interest in other ways. Happened to me too many times in the past.
 

Xun

Member
Does she have feelings for you, want to have a relationship, or was it just fun for her too?
We've not had any sort of chat about where we're going, so I'm not entirely sure what she's thinking with it all.

For me I'm seeing it purely as a bit of fun.

Should I take the initiative and ask her or just wait until she asks me?
 

GK86

Homeland Security Fail
I guess, it just feels like I should have more than 24 hours worth of conversation (at one response every few hours) before asking them out. But what do I know? Guess things move faster on Tinder.

Ask them out ASAP. Don't wait around.
 
I should do this more, problem is too often I don't seem to care enough to make the effort. Probably means I shouldn't be going on those dates in the first place.

Also: Bangkok is the worst! Add to the heat and humidity the spicy food and it's a recipe for a nightmare.
Dunno, I sweat profusely so even I think it's gross to meet someone you don't know like that. If you can't help it fine but if it's as simple a second shirt then I'll just do that


Yeah sounds like it. As much as this thread stresses the importance of not being needy, etc, women will absolutely start acting distant if they think you're not that interested in them, especially sexually. Even if you show interest in other ways. Happened to me too many times in the past.
Uhhhhhhhh, what? Showing them you're into them is the same as being needy to you? I think the problems are on you
 

ATF487

Member
Yeah sounds like it. As much as this thread stresses the importance of not being needy, etc, women will absolutely start acting distant if they think you're not that interested in them, especially sexually. Even if you show interest in other ways. Happened to me too many times in the past.

This is definitely possible, I really have no idea. Maybe after she was away for two weeks she expected me to be more eager to come home with her. I probably would have done it too if I wasn't feeling so shitty after walking her home (it was nearly 100f and humid, I never do well with that sort of weather) but if I'm being honest I wasn't that bothered about it.

We had been dating for about 2 months and she came home with me a couple of times in that period, I thought it was a mostly mutual preference for friendship after she got a sense of what I was like

Uhhhhhhhh, what? Showing them you're into them is the same as being needy to you? I think the problems are on you

He's not saying that at all...just that there's a line between being over eager (or too needy) and being so aloof that you seem disinterested.
 

gaiages

Banned
Should I feel guilty or just go with the flow?

Not sure what you should feel guilty about? Y'all had sex (I'm guessing), it's not a big deal, just decide what you want from there I guess.

Spent the night at my GF's place. Since she lives with her sister she slept on the couch with me. Didn't have to but did anyway, it's way less comfortable than the bed. She did end up going back to bed because she was too hot, did so without waking me, so I woke up in the middle of the night to an empty couch. Kinda thought that was poor form, don't you wake someone when you switch sleeping places and let them know? Just a nitpick tho.

Then we spent the whole next day with eachother, walking around the lake and then cooking. I even watched the olympics horse jumping with her (snorefest but she's watched footy with me so eh). Feels like things are back to normal, super happy about that. :)

lol, no, unless they were leaving or some shit. I'd be more annoyed if someone woke me up to tell me they were going to go to the bed.
 
This is definitely possible, I really have no idea. Maybe after she was away for two weeks she expected me to be more eager to come home with her. I probably would have done it too if I wasn't feeling so shitty after walking her home (it was nearly 100f and humid, I never do well with that sort of weather) but if I'm being honest I wasn't that bothered about it.

We had been dating for about 2 months and she came home with me a couple of times in that period, I thought it was a mostly mutual preference for friendship after she got a sense of what I was like


He's not saying that at all...just that there's a line between being over eager (or too needy) and being so aloof that you seem disinterested.

I don't read it that way. He's conflating being needy and showing interested buy saying as much as people say don't be needy in this thread, you have to show interest. They're completely separate things.

I agree with gaiages also, I guess it depends on the person but it's not like she just bolted since it's her place. Maybe you want to know she's OK but I don't think you need to.
 
Spent the night at my GF's place. Since she lives with her sister she slept on the couch with me. Didn't have to but did anyway, it's way less comfortable than the bed. She did end up going back to bed because she was too hot, did so without waking me, so I woke up in the middle of the night to an empty couch. Kinda thought that was poor form, don't you wake someone when you switch sleeping places and let them know? Just a nitpick tho.

Then we spent the whole next day with eachother, walking around the lake and then cooking. I even watched the olympics horse jumping with her (snorefest but she's watched footy with me so eh). Feels like things are back to normal, super happy about that. :)

Do you like being woken up when you're sleeping for something so pointless? :p
 
I have some reservations. I'm scared because she revealed her grandfather molested her. She is almost too open about her sex life. She has no filter. It's kind of sexy but horrifying at the same time. I don't view her or any woman as a "whore" or anything, but I am afraid of STD's, even though she says she never had them and was recently tested for HIV.

dude.. don't do this. Stop having reservations about something you know nothing about. If you want to wait, just go get tested together. Tell her you wanna do hands shit.

But don't cut her out because you are "scared of STDs"

Unless you don't like her, than whatever :D Congrats on the shaft touch!
 
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