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[jshackles]

So this morning while walking into my office building, I noticed a flesh colored something on the side of the road by the entrance. Took another glance or two before realizing it's a pretty big sized fake dick (with balls). Looks like plastic or... you know... rubber-y.

I'm sitting at my desk busting up laughing about it on the regular, and I keep glancing out the window to check to see if it's still there (it is, 4 hours later!). I'm not even sure who would be responsible for disposing of it - the city, maybe?

I work with a bunch of uptights that would send me straight to HR if I even uttered the word "dildo" at work. And since I feel the overwhelming need to tell people about this, thanks for listening GAF.

 

[haxan7]

My dad actually found a big black double ended dildo on the road once.

 

[farmerboy]

 

[Jooxed]

You didn't take it home?

 

[BluRayHiDef]

So this morning while walking into my office building, I noticed a flesh colored something on the side of the road by the entrance. Took another glance or two before realizing it's a pretty big sized fake dick (with balls). Looks like plastic or... you know... rubber-y.

I'm sitting at my desk busting up laughing about it on the regular, and I keep glancing out the window to check to see if it's still there (it is, 4 hours later!). I'm not even sure who would be responsible for disposing of it - the city, maybe?

I work with a bunch of uptights that would send me straight to HR if I even uttered the word "dildo" at work. And since I feel the overwhelming need to tell people about this, thanks for listening GAF.

No picture. So, I don't believe you.

 

[jshackles]

No picture. So, I don't believe you.

I actually just faked going out to my car to make a phone call, snapped a few pictures but not sure if I can post them here lol

 

[BluRayHiDef]

I actually just faked going out to my car to make a phone call, snapped a few pictures but not sure if I can post them here lol

I've seen users post pictures of the Ballschinian from Men in Black and a "Big Black Butt" sex toy, so I don't think anything would happen to you. However, to be sure, just ask EviLore.

 

[BlackOlivesMatter]

No fetish toy threads

 

[EviLore]

I've seen users post pictures of the Ballschinian from Men in Black and a "Big Black Butt" sex toy, so I don't think anything would happen to you. However, to be sure, just ask EviLore.

All good if you want to jshackles

 

[jshackles]

Okay so I noticed this from across the street

"What the hell is that? Gotta get a closer look!"

"that's a dildo alright"

Dirty old street dildo

 

[Taxexemption]

I've never found anything like a dildo but on multiple occasions I've found what appeared to be gags used to prevent people from closing their mouth on bike trails. I see this stuff in what is one of the nicer cities in my area. I have also found used condoms in the same park on many occasions, including near children's playgrounds. Despite it being a really nice area, and it being illegal to smoke or drink alcohol in the park you will very frequently find alcohol containers in the trash cans. During the day everything is really nice, but it's pretty clear that at night people party.

 

[Duellist]

Pick it up and smell it

 

[jshackles]

Pick it up and smell it

 

[haxan7]

better slip it inside to make sure it's a dildo

 

[NeoGiffer]

Spoiler

 

[Stouffers]

That’s the Danny D. Pretty pricey to just chuck onto the street. Run it thought the dishwasher (by itself) and it will be as good as new.

 

[borborygmus]

It'd be a funny prank if it coomed if someone got closer to take a look.

 

[BluRayHiDef]

Maybe some drunk woman dropped it out of her purse while walking to a car or something. Who knows?

 

[haxan7]

It'd be a funny prank if it coomed if someone got closer to take a look.

 

[Gp1]

 

[Stouffers]

Maybe some drunk woman dropped it out of her purse while walking to a car or something. Who knows?

Might not be from a woman. Only way to know for sure is an OP sniff test. Assuming he knows what male/female holes smell like.

 

[Nikana]

I actually have...

When I was driving home once, on a roundabout, there was a very large black dildo and it's box next to it in the middle of the roundabout. The words double dong were in very big letters.

 

[Jethalal]

Hmm...CyberPunk VR released early..

 

[jshackles]

I actually have...

When I was driving home once, on a roundabout, there was a very large black dildo and it's box next to it in the middle of the roundabout. The words double dong were in very big letters.

You might live in the same city as haxan7 's dad

 

[Can't decide]

Twice and both in the main street of the city centre.

A glittery purple one that was just laying in the middle of the street and a flesh colored one placed on the window sill of a children's nursery, of all places.

 

[Woo-Fu]

 

[Nikana]

You might live in the same city as haxan7 's dad

You might live in the same city as haxan7 's dad

Spoiler alert.

I'm Haxans father.

 

[DESTROYA]

Should put a sign on it ”looking for a new home”

 

[teezzy]

Does roadkill count?

Asking for a friend

 

[epicnemesis]

I have questions. Many questions.

 

[jshackles]

I have questions. Many questions.

Me too. Almost curious enough to ask our physical security guys to pull up CCTV footage that I know exists.

Almost.

 

[jshackles]

Well I came out of the building for lunch, the dildo is gone.

Which one of you came and picked it up?

 

[ThatStupidLion]

its the only kind of sex toys I use

 

[poodaddy]

Well I came out of the building for lunch, the dildo is gone.

Which one of you came and picked it up?

I needed a plunger.

 

[Men_in_Boxes]

You don't find sex toys. Sex toys find you. He chose you OP. A sex toy gets one, maybe two owners at most and he chose you. Do not treat this lightly OP.

 

[The Time Of Mario]

Never found a sex toy, but I'm sure I've seen some condoms on the road before.

 

[poppabk]

When I was in high school someone found a dildo in the woods by the running fields and unceremoniously dumped it in the middle of campus. It was sat there for a good part of the day.

 

[levyjl1988]

Only in CyberPunk 2077.

 

[Rillania]

That's one hell of a way to donate a dildo to a person in need on the sly.

 

[Virt McPolygon]

Virtual detective here. It's possible that someone stuck it to the back of a car as a prank. Owner of the car didn't notice, drove off and the dildo eventually fell off.

 

[nush]

When I worked for a VR porn company there was a box of dildos (Used for reference for making 3d renders of dicks)in the office. I'd take one and stick ity to the underside of my bosses desk, when when he came in, sat on his chair and wheeled under the desk he'd get a dick in the dick. He fell for this prank so many times.

 

[Stouffers]

Virtual detective here. It's possible that someone stuck it to the back of a car as a prank. Owner of the car didn't notice, drove off and the dildo eventually fell off.

Too expensive to be a prank dildo. It definitely fell out of someone.. they probably tried to trade up for that yellow fire hydrant and was rushed to the hospital for severe rectal trauma. Check the hydrant for blood/feces.

 

[jshackles]

Finally (after work) texted one of my "cool" co-workers about it - he wasn't in the office today. "Dude, was it black or white? How big? Double-sided?" This is why we're friends.

 

[Rentahamster]

Took another glance or two before realizing it's a pretty big sized fake dick (with balls). Looks like plastic or... you know... rubber-y.

Please tell me you didn't accidentally the whole big sized fake dick (with balls)

 

[Maiden Voyage]

Finally (after work) texted one of my "cool" co-workers about it - he wasn't in the office today. "Dude, was it black or white? How big? Double-sided?" This is why we're friends.

A man who knows his dildos is a friend indeed

 

[Coolwhhip]

Danish kids were probably playing with it.

 

[fran.fernandez]

When I just move to Osaka I rent a place in a bad area, I didn’t knew was bad.
near the red district, I went to work and in the middle of the street in front of the apartment there was some dildos, used condoms and cosplay clothes.

 

[Papa]

What kinda dildo would report you to HR for saying dildo?

 

[Stouffers]

A man who knows his dildos is a friend indeed

To share the double sided?

 

[SpiceRacz]

Thanks was wondering where it went