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Law Enforcement is Fucking Nutty

Man, I have nothing but huge respects for law enforcement officers - one of my friends who I game used to be a paramedic EMT decided to become a cop at a young age. Obviously having close friend friends in the law enforcement you get to hear some of the scariest and also funniest stories from that world. I am not sure how some people are able to work in such an environment.

All of this is in Florida.

One of the scariest thing that he got called for 6 months ago roughly was a vehicle crash. A middle aged woman who was under all sorts drugs influence including fenatyl crashed a vehicle with her 6 year old daughter. The daughter died in his arms, but the mother didn't. Fast forward to last week, she finally got arrested and put to jail after all the drug tests and documentation. She then had the audacity to have no remorse for her daughters death and was claiming it was not her fault. How fucked do you have to be?

Another scary case he was following a what's supposedly a drunk driver at night. It was pitch black and you could barely see anything. His car ends up hitting something on the road. He stopped chasing the dude and got out and realized he ran over a person's body. Scary part was that he didn't see him, and the body was apparently fresh and there were bullet casings around him. What are the chances of this? They opened up an investigation now on where the body came from in the first place. My buddy now is living with guilt because he believes the person could have been saved and him running him over ended his life.

Also, just recently he got called in for a homicide. Where this dudes wife shot him in the face while he was taking a shit and killing him. She was claiming it was in self defense. She is now on jail and is guilty of murder.

Now for the more funny stuff - he came over to arrest a drunk driver. She was so drunk, that she started having liquid dirahhe in the middle of the inspection. The only reason he didn't arrest her was because he didn't want to clean his car.

Last funny story - he was doing an off duty work at a strip join. Then this person's car gets broken into. They find the dude in the dark. Very shitfaced amd completely blacked out drunk. The car belonged to a stripper that worked there. He was breaking in and started stealing stuff.

When they started talking to him, the guy pissed his pants and everything is all yellow. My buddy put on gloves to start searching him. He got his piss stained wallet out and took out his id. Turns out, this fucking drunk idiot himself was actually a cop from another police department who was utterly shitfaced. They called his police department, he got fired on the spot and arrested.

TLDR, I would never be able to do this type of shit and the sad part is that I sincerely believe police officers don't get paid enough for the stupid and traumatizing shit they have to deal with on daily basis.

Anyone knows a cop or has some interesting stories to share?
 
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All of this is in Florida.
well-there-it-is.gif

Pretty much every crazy domestic violence story comes out of Florida. You see those videos where people be going apeshit in the home? Yep, that's the good ol' Sunshine State.
 
well-there-it-is.gif

Pretty much every crazy domestic violence story comes out of Florida. You see those videos where people be going apeshit in the home? Yep, that's the good ol' Sunshine State.

Yeah, Florida has a lot of crazies.

He is near the panhandle. On the border of Alabama. Fun fact, it's Florida, but their timezone is Central as opposed to EST which is where I live down south.
 
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I'm a criminal justice grad that went to school with alot of law enforcement, security and army vets. My perspective changed alot, like you get a different view of law enforcement folks up close. Its like good and bad. On one hand theres stories of things that make you have to respect the job they do and then on the other hand its like, You understand why situations like George Floyd happen. Like there was some blatant racism up in there.
 

Jinzo Prime

Member
This is going to be an unpopular opinion, but I believe police in the US, especially in rural counties, are underpaid for the job they do. We need to treat policing like a real profession or trade instead of just a job and pay people accordingly.

Again, i'm sure its different in big cities, but in more rural places, its a bunch of dudes with zero resources trying to deal with drugged out folks shitting themselves for less money than working in factory.
 
I agree. I feel like people who see street action especially probably deserve a 50 percent or more increase in pay.

One interesting story my professor told me, he had just started working for LA pd, THIS dude had never associated with a black person before, he knew no black people and in his first few days he got in a chase with black gangbangers, who started shooting as they assigned him to a black area. He also worked the Simpson crime scene.
 

BadBurger

Is 'That Pure Potato'
I have a buddy who is an ex cop. He was only a cop for three or four years in a rather rural area. Not deep country, but definitely not the suburbs either.

He tells one story about how they kept getting a call to 911 from an empty home. It had a landline, but no one lived there. The number would call 911, and the call would always be silent. They would get a call from the number every few nights for months. He had to go and check the house several times - never anyone there, not even a phone was hooked up that they could find. The phone/cable company ended up having to cut the service off somehow to stop the calls from occurring.

Another story - some old rich family with a huge kind of estate called reporting a possible break in. Nothing was missing, but when they returned home they found one of their doors wide open (as explained to me, it was practically a mansion with three or four doors). Small town cop, my friend has no partner, and has to search the whole house himself. But the homeowner tags along. They don't find anything. A week or so later he gets another call, same location, same thing. This time when they search the house they find a dog collar that no one can explain sitting on the kitchen counter, and a single hand print on a window in the kitchen that was all greasy - oil or something. But never found whoever was breaking in. And nothing was ever found on the camera footage.

He actually has a bunch of stories from his time as a cop that he's shared. Maybe I'll type more up later.
 

Doom85

Member
I have a buddy who is an ex cop. He was only a cop for three or four years in a rather rural area. Not deep country, but definitely not the suburbs either.

He tells one story about how they kept getting a call to 911 from an empty home. It had a landline, but no one lived there. The number would call 911, and the call would always be silent. They would get a call from the number every few nights for months. He had to go and check the house several times - never anyone there, not even a phone was hooked up that they could find. The phone/cable company ended up having to cut the service off somehow to stop the calls from occurring.

Another story - some old rich family with a huge kind of estate called reporting a possible break in. Nothing was missing, but when they returned home they found one of their doors wide open (as explained to me, it was practically a mansion with three or four doors). Small town cop, my friend has no partner, and has to search the whole house himself. But the homeowner tags along. They don't find anything. A week or so later he gets another call, same location, same thing. This time when they search the house they find a dog collar that no one can explain sitting on the kitchen counter, and a single hand print on a window in the kitchen that was all greasy - oil or something. But never found whoever was breaking in. And nothing was ever found on the camera footage.

He actually has a bunch of stories from his time as a cop that he's shared. Maybe I'll type more up later.

Scared Saturday Night Live GIF by HULU


BadBurger trying to stealthily transition this thread from cops dealing with fucked up shit to just a spooky stories thread…

Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth Meyers
 

StreetsofBeige

Gold Member
Crazy stuff. Huge respect to police officers that essentially have to deal with adult toddlers who argue with them, berate them, and just are in sad states in general.
Amen to that.

You'd think law enforcement would be spending their time on teenagers and young adults immature at their stage of life and doing drunk things at college or street racing.

Instead, you got grown ass manchildren and crooks who are 30, 40 and even 50 years old. Well, at least when it comes to crime it seems to tail off fast when people hit senior citizens age. I guess all the numbnuts realize it's too hard to get away with being a dumbass when they're fat and got arthritis.
 
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Mossybrew

Member
I've worked in county probation for ten years now, and though I'm just a paper-pusher, I do have an inside position in law enforcement - and at least in my town, these are all decent folks doing a fucking incredibly hard job.
 
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