Last night I mentioned I was posting more often here to try and relieve the anxiety.
Nothing is helping.
I've done all these everyone will always recommend....
Walking outdoors, gaming, posting here, taking deep breaths.... I'm trying everything and I'm just having major anxiety attacks.
I took two showers today and I always take hot or even "steam" baths when I can. The latter also temporarily relieves my nasal congestion when I have it.I was told that a hot bath is good for anxiety. It’s what mental wards did for their patients when they wouldn’t stop panicking.
I know the feeling and it is your depression and anxiety. We end up imagining things that aren't really true. Still, I would recommend taking a break from social media, and focus your mind on doing something more productive, maybe a hobby you might have enjoyed in the past that you fell out of, or find a new one. Something you enjoy that you can take pride in doing.I've had about three or four friends, online and irl, that have either seem very distant when talking to me or just straight out avoiding me.
And no, not all of them for the most part, was I whining about any problems.
I feel like I'm annoying everyone. I dunno if I should just stay offline completely for the next few days.
Nope. I probably should considering I'm an unhealthy weight. 6 foot 2 inches but weigh around 155 lbs but maybe less now since I'm barely eating.
Random girl walks up and asks: why do you look so sad? Are you okay?
I guess re-reading you mean actual baths though. I've done that and it helps but very short.
I heard about those. I know autistic people use that.I heartily recommend buying and sleeping with a weighted blanket. When you feel your heart start racing, jump under it and let the weight envelop your body. I am anxious person myself and one of my psychiatrist friends recommended it to me as a non-medical measure and it does work, at least for me.
I also had a TMNT Tiger Handheld. I bet it was even the same one. Tall vertically and green? I gave it to someone to borrow a few years ago and never got it back, sadly. It still worked. Things are looking up in that I applied for a job on Thursday, got the call yesterday, and finished my paperwork online this morning. As long as everything goes cherry (like background check, which i'm never worried about because I follow societies rules), I start orientation next Thursday. It's just a seasonal position but there's opportunity to stay on if my performance is good. And I never half-ass jobs. So, fingers crossed.GardenOfAbbylon one thing I didn’t know in my 20’s is how much I could move beyond my 20’s. I think the same thing applies to being a teenager. During the worst part of it, a bright future doesn’t feel obtainable. Being out of a job, not feeling like you’re worth it, losing someone close to you, and relying on someone else to always pick up the slack. I started there many times. I went through therapy, tried drowning it out with addiction, and then self destruction really hit me hard. I tried to fight my problems without first equipping myself. I didn’t take the extra steps that allow myself to be better. This isn’t some preachy, advice post either. It totally sucked where I was at. I didn’t actually feel better about my situation until I failed at the one thing I was trying to achieve. I failed nursing school and I had relied upon that goal for a decade. I was already thinking of which type of healthcare I wanted to work in too. It all vanished. I dumped all my books in the large dumpster outside the apartment building. This was two hours away from home. I had nothing going for me. Just a bunch of debt, clothes, and my car. I ended up having to start from scratch, so I found a job working in IT. I had to work hard and learn a lot. That got me to push myself. Now I’m working, have kids, loans are paid, and it isn’t perfect- it just isn’t what it was.
I also came from a very conservative home. My mother was super religious and when she was sexually assaulted by a pastor. She almost drove my sibling and I off the bridge. She even admitted it on Facebook two years ago. My own mother telling me that she saw me in the backseat playing my TMNT Tiger handheld and she wanted to take all our lives because of a pastor. It’s hard to think on the past sometimes. Mental conditions can be caused by environmental factors, so I do believe what you’re around plays into everything. Which is why starting something new is so hard. It’s also necessary to say goodbye to toxic people.
think i will try to do a few of these, started to let myself go a bit this year and this post stood out for some reason. good points as well.I'm 29, will be 30 in like 3 months, and my 20s feel like another blur just like like my teen years
Simple rules I follow:
- dont buy so much dumb shit; there's nothing lamer than being "the broke guy/girl"; if you can't afford to buy it thrice... you can't afford it once
- dont eat processed crap
- read books
- exercise every day, even if it is just walking
- lift weights
- dont do drugs or drink
- take vitamins, especially D3 during this pandemic or during the winter when you're exposed to sun far less
- discomfort and discipline are your friend
- people are always going to dislike you; just dislike them back - what are they gonna do about it?
- avoid social media; except for GAF... GAF is home. GAF is life
- keep your wardrobe really simple, but buy nicer items that just kinda blend together - avoid graphics. just keep it simple and classic; chances are you'll always be the best dressed in the room as a result
- keep your living space clean
- drink your vegetables and eat more water
you can do all this. anyone can. it's easy crap. realize that your resistance to do this crap is your enemy, and just dont be a bitch - legiterally
Conservative homes, I get and don't get. Like I understand that they try and instill morals and values for you to use as tools in life; but, it feels more and more these days that those rules and morals are based in prejudice. From my point of view, anyway. I don't have kids, and don't know if I ever will, but I know i'd raise them to see everyone is equal and regardless of sexual orientation or skin colour, we're all the same.
In my head, you sounded like Shaggy from Scooby DooAs someone who was once as loony left as you could possibly get, i.e. "there is no self maaaaaan, we're all just water and stardust maaaaan, what even is property like how do you own something maaaaaan, humanity is just like one big organism maaaaan";
I also had a TMNT Tiger Handheld. I bet it was even the same one. Tall vertically and green? I gave it to someone to borrow a few years ago and never got it back, sadly. It still worked. Things are looking up in that I applied for a job on Thursday, got the call yesterday, and finished my paperwork online this morning. As long as everything goes cherry (like background check, which i'm never worried about because I follow societies rules), I start orientation next Thursday. It's just a seasonal position but there's opportunity to stay on if my performance is good. And I never half-ass jobs. So, fingers crossed.
Conservative homes, I get and don't get. Like I understand that they try and instill morals and values for you to use as tools in life; but, it feels more and more these days that those rules and morals are based in prejudice. From my point of view, anyway. I don't have kids, and don't know if I ever will, but I know i'd raise them to see everyone is equal and regardless of sexual orientation or skin colour, we're all the same. But I guess that might also come from me being mixed race LGBT. That's unfortunate to hear about what happened to your mother. I can sympathize. I had my family come to therapy with me once, and mom revealed that someone in my family did things to her years ago. I've come to find out who and I refuse to have contact with them, even though they always have treated me well. But it's in agreement that if my grandfather was still alive (he passed 17 years ago), it would break his heart. And it would. But I want to break this family members face. And i'm not a violent person. And this person, is super holier-than-thou religious cult too.
I don't know what I came to accomplish with this post. I guess to just get it off my chest?
unload thy psyche, m8So, what's this thread really for?
I ask because I have some pretty heavy shit to talk about and I don't know where else to go.
I see a therapist biweekly and I'm starting to get some insights here and there but haven't delved too deeply into what happened to me and why I'm there (therapy).
Am I in the right place?
I just don't care what people think of me anymore and need to get this shit out in public in exchange for a little advice or encouragement, or both.
I think a lot of us are like this. I’m somewhat of a self destructionist. I feel I’m not worthy or that I’m just going to fail in the end anyway for whatever reason, so I sabotage myself, as a way to have some kind of control... at least I think that’s why I do it. I have to just keep telling myself I am worthy of happiness and success and keep following the light. Good luck to you buddyI recently found out that I have 100% inferiority complex, since I was around 9, as a result of my experiences with other people.
I had these thoughts of never being good enough or no more than above average, so I'm fulfilling my own prophecy and never push myself further, in anything I do.
I stopped drawing, learning math, turned down multiple promotion offers, friendly invitations, don't pursue or accept sex anymore, and even sabotage my chances to build friendships. All because I fear being seen as lesser, incapable, incompetent, and undesirable. Funny enough, because I rejected so many opportunities I mostly give others the impression that I really am all those things, even though I've proven I can do better.
I suppose that's why they call it "damaged goods". Sure it can still do all those cool things, but there's a big chance that something will go wrong.
I still fear people, but I don't fear myself, so I've gained these ever so wonderful traits:
Calm, Arbitrary, Cynical, Callous, and other minor traits... Yes I've been playing Crusader Kings 3 lately.
But all is not so woeful. In recent years I have made some major/minor improvements, but I mostly just do it in solitude. Life is generally better now, than it was 5+ years ago.