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Anthony Scaramucci explicit interview with Ryan Lizza at the New Yorker

M

mike6467

Member
OGBpfva.png


Wonder how long before these get deleted. Lol.
 
D

DonShula

Member
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

This is good.
 
E

Extollere

Sucks at poetry
It's hilarious how these guys are completely incapable of apologizing for the right things.


"I fucking killed a couple of hookers, so what?!"

later:

"I'm sorry I said fucking"
 
P

Psykoboy2

Member
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

This is goddamn golden!
 
K

~Kinggi~

Banned
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

legit hilarious i had lulz
 
P

Prophaniti

Banned
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...
Can't breathe.
 
N

norm9

Member
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

hehe
 
G

gutshot

Member
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

Tag this man.
 
E

Euphony

Banned
It's like watching a train accident happen in slow motion...while you're riding in it. I want off

Imperfected said:
"'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"
Click to expand...

I feel like I've seen this before but I can't quite place where...
 
D

DonShula

Member
Angry Grimace said:
Mooch Haiku

Priebus is the leak
Bannon blows his own cannon
No one fucks with Mooch
Click to expand...

And this is delightful. Well done.

Saganator said:
It's amazing that a PR person is allowed to act this unprofessional in public. Even the shittiest company would've fired Mooch by now. Not for the Trump White House, where you can act like a total asshole and probably get a pat on the back.

I used to assume people who worked at the White House in any capacity were ultimate professionals, now... not so much. Trump and company are playing limbo lowering the bar so much.
Click to expand...

But this is sobering me up. WH standards are now below that of even the worst private company, and we also have Trump out there teaching a metric ton of Boy Scouts that if you act like an unrepentant asshole, you too could be president someday.

Call me old but I'm about to clutch my pearls and tell people to think of the children.
 
M

Mahonay

Banned
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...
giphy.gif
 
H

HowZatOZ

Banned
John Oliver is actually going to struggle in keeping up with all this content GOP is giving you American's. We are actually in a time where politician comedians have too much material.
 
S

Seik

Banned
Imperfected said:
"Listen," I replied, holding back a yawn. "It's two AM. The rest of this interview is going to have to be off-the-record, because I'm going to bed, and frankly you've been talking about dicks for six hours. I guess I can push this to my voicemail if you just want to keep talking."

Scaramucci was apparently undeterred. I am not certain he even heard me, enraptured as he was feverishly recounting his assessment of the White House staff: "Priebus, he's a real timid cock-sucker. All lips, maybe a tease of the tongue, but he doesn't even swallow."

The fact he was becoming increasingly flustered and slightly sweaty was abundantly apparent. "Now, Sessions, he's got a five cock a day habbit," 'The Mooch' continued, huffing out in an exhausted-sounding pant. "Not like back-to-back, he spaces them out, but he can't finish a thirty dollar Italian dinner without popping one in his cheek, y'know?"

Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."

Beyond this point the message from 'The Mooch" became completely impossible to decipher, devolving into sounds that studio folley artists assure me are aesthetically similar to spoonfuls of nutella being hurled full-force into a quivering pan of peach Jell-O.
Click to expand...

Holy shiiiiiit LOL.

Guy should work as a comedian instead of being in politics.
 
S

Shauni

Member
RustyNails said:
This dude is literally Silvio from Sopranos

Silvio_dante_soprano.JPG
Click to expand...

Nah, not at all. Silvio curses a lot and is Italian, but he's actually one of the more managed and calm people in the the crew. Scaramucci is closer to Christopher or Paulie. In fact, I would easily see half of these statements coming out of Paulie's mouth.
 
S

Suikoguy

I whinny my fervor lowly, for his length is not as great as those of the Hylian war stallions
Seik said:
Holy shiiiiiit LOL.

Guy should work as a comedian instead of being in politics.
Click to expand...

Uh.. that was satire.
I mean, I guess I can understand why you think it might be real.
Satire is really fucking hard to write at the moment.

Imperfected gave it his very best. Which btw, do you write for one of the current satirist publications or something like The Daily Show? If not, someone needs to hire you Imperfected.
 
W

Wamb0wneD

Member
bounchfx said:
crazy, but seems like pretty convenient timing to distract from the real news :/
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1412088

all of these people should be in jail. it's beyond ridiculous now.
Click to expand...


Exactly. I posted this in the Hillary book thread and everybody just ignores it lol. This is working for them, nobody gives a damn about actual news. This guy is perfect for distracting people with his cocaine fueled BS. Who needs to read excerpts of an important testimony when one can crack jokes about an idiot who spouts nonsense in interviews and on twitter.
 
E

E92 M3

Member
Shauni said:
Nah, not at all. Silvio curses a lot and is Italian, but he's actually one of the more managed and calm people in the the crew. Scaramucci is closer to Christopher or Paulie. In fact, I would easily see half of these statements coming out of Paulie's mouth.
Click to expand...

5fff93f3dc6b138bde4d4e1fe5ad28ed--bada-bing-the-sopranos.jpg
 
S

spelen

Member
i'm starting to feel like house of cards must be an accurate portrayal of politics in the white house good lord what a mess!
 
S

Seik

Banned
Suikoguy said:
Uh.. that was satire.
I mean, I guess I can understand why you think it might be real.
Satire is really fucking hard to write at the moment.

Imperfected gave it his very best. Which btw, do you write for one of the current satirist publications or something like The Daily Show? If not, someone needs to hire you Imperfected.
Click to expand...

Hahaha oh, my bad, but honestly that was actually believable! :lol

Just like you said, writting satire must be one hell of a job these days. Props to Imperfected, you got a lot of laughs out of me!
 
S

SaviorX

Member
Professionalism is completely out the window, and what remains is a pitiful husk of what our country's standards used to be.

This administration has been such a disgraceful display
 
N

Nekofrog

Banned
Come on down to the one on one White House cocksucking emporium, we have everything you need to suck your own cock.

Religious shame optional!
 
S

Shauni

Member
Wamb0wneD said:
Exactly. I posted this in the Hillary book thread and everybody just ignores it lol. This is working for them, nobody gives a damn about actual news. This guy is perfect for distracting people with his cocaine fueled BS. Who needs to read excerpts of an important testimony when one can crack jokes about an idiot who spouts nonsense in interviews and on twitter.
Click to expand...

Yes, because the Russia narrative around Trump has died so easily many, many times lol
 
R

Random Human

They were trying to grab your prize. They work for the mercenary. The masked man.
Shauni said:
Nah, not at all. Silvio curses a lot and is Italian, but he's actually one of the more managed and calm people in the the crew. Scaramucci is closer to Christopher or Paulie. In fact, I would easily see half of these statements coming out of Paulie's mouth.
Click to expand...

Yup, this guy is more like if Paulie looked like a younger Silvio.
 
B

Bobby Roberts

Banned
Imperfected said:
Scaramucci licked his chops audibly. "Now, Banner, he's a goddamn cock event horizon. I've heard people nut their pants just walking too close to his office door. That pigly summvabitch breathes cock, as far as any of us can tell, like some kind of... some kind of albino cavefish raised for generations in total cock."
Click to expand...

This is good stuff.
 
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