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[Darkmakaimura]

I have one more advice.

OP, avoid anything negative. That includes even fiction. Try to watch something that sort of funny and innocent.

I think a good example is the Three's Company sitcom or even Seinfeld. There's like entire episodes where it's just about people complaining they received cold soup at the deli or something or they're late for a party.

Funny stuff but really innocent and simple and might put a smile on your face hopefully.

By the way, I don't know if you like Red Letter Media but I watched this episode about a week ago and I was pretty depressed and it actually managed to make me laugh quite a bit.




This was a hilarious episode probably one of the funniest I've ever seen by these guys.

 

[Ionian]

By the way, if I am incorrect about what I said here above, I could use advice myself.

Currently I got some relief but severe depression might kick in again soon and I need to know what to do because I definitely don't want to go through what I went through the last couple of weeks again, if ever possibly. It's basically like a living nightmare.

In fact I still haven't slept yet because I'm still having issues even with relief.

But as far as anyone depressed here including the OP, all I can do is offer my prayers. This goes for the OP and anyone else here who is suffering and that's regardless of whether I like you or not because nobody should have to go through what I have been.

Depression runs in the family for me. I have moments of brilliance then massive destruction.

Kinda used to it. I can't stop it. It's why I care. It fucking sucks as it's so random. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, ever. Everyone gets it, just some people more. Just reality.

There are drugs that help but they only hold it back, therapy too. Yet doing both helps tremendously yet is extremely hard.

Die laughing or crying, those are the options. I'm still laughing. I'm not happy every day though.

 

[Ionian]

By the way, if I am incorrect about what I said here above, I could use advice myself.

Currently I got some relief but severe depression might kick in again soon and I need to know what to do because I definitely don't want to go through what I went through the last couple of weeks again, if ever possibly. It's basically like a living nightmare.

In fact I still haven't slept yet because I'm still having issues even with relief.

But as far as anyone depressed here including the OP, all I can do is offer my prayers. This goes for the OP and anyone else here who is suffering and that's regardless of whether I like you or not because nobody should have to go through what I have been.

I ended up in hospital. Please avoid that.

Watching people die is horrible, at least where I live.

Stuck in a bed and can't piss due to an IV, shit ain't no joke. You end up a prisoner and then they tell you to fuck off after a certified amount of time. I asked for more time, basically told me to fuck off. I Only wanted a couple of days as I couldn't walk, haha. Hospital is a business, end of story.

You say what? They say "uh-huh", they give free taxi tickets here for leavers. I'm not joking.

Edit3: I'm still on a walker. Avoid at all costs dude. Their advice to me was just 'walk', pretty difficult when confined to a fucking bed. Avoid at all costs. Even had a nurse walk me up and down stairs. I did fine but lost all faith in myself, was so embarrassing.

 

[22:22:22]

Yo OP. You're no alone. Lost my friend group about 10 years ago because I wasn't doing well.

Reconnected through xbox with acquaintance and became best bro's for a year or 3. I did something stupid as well (not going to mention) and he broke contact with me. I've been living in solitary for the last decade minus the last 3 years where I met a woman who became a friend, fuck buddy and friends again. She fell in love. I didn't. So she's moving on and for a while i was back to being alone. Recently it's going better (breakthrough on the psychological side) and rejoined the gym so I'm having some social contact again. It's also the reason I post the way I do I guess... saying friend and brother, I'm happy you guys and gals are here; even tho I have my bad days and show my other face here. The face that's the result of all the above.

I wish I didn't have so much shit in my own head to be any kind of meaningful help to you but know that you are and deserved to be loved regardless. We are here to learn therefore we make mistakes whicho sometimes have consequences that are quite severe. You, I and many others know this

Keep up keeping up



2222

 

[Darkmakaimura]

I ended up in hospital. Please avoid that.

Watching people die is horrible, at least where I live.

Stuck in a bed and can't piss due to an IV, shit ain't no joke. You end up a prisoner and then they tell you to fuck off after a certified amount of time. I asked for more time, basically told me to fuck off. I Only wanted a couple of days as I couldn't walk, haha. Hospital is a business, end of story.

You say what? They say "uh-huh", they give free taxi tickets here for leavers. I'm not joking.

Edit3: I'm still on a walker. Avoid at all costs dude. Their advice to me was just 'walk', pretty difficult when confined to a fucking bed. Avoid at all costs. Even had a nurse walk me up and down stairs. I did fine but lost all faith in myself, was so embarrassing.

That is infuriating to read.

When I was in suicide watch, the nurses there were terrible. They were asking me why I was crying and laughing at me and I'm not even exaggerating.

They treat you like a criminal.

Ending up in suicide watch actually making it worse for my condition.

 

[Ionian]

That is infuriating to read.

When I was in suicide watch, the nurses there were terrible. They were asking me why I was crying and laughing at me and I'm not even exaggerating.

They treat you like a criminal.

Ending up in suicide watch actually making it worse for my condition.

Jesus dude. My heart goes out to you truly and honestly. I simply meant my experience.

I guess I was lucky. Spent Christmas tanked up (drugged) to my head, was terrible.

I wouldn't wish it on an enemy. The nurses here are something special, underpaid and very very over-worked.

All very young. Yet they take joy in their life. Makes you change thoughts. Both ways.

I walked out of the ward and my jaw dropped at a nurse. She offered me tea, I said no just wanted sleeping tablets.

I slept with a smile on my face.

 

[Halo is Back]

What game systems do you play on?

 

[Halo is Back]

That is infuriating to read.

When I was in suicide watch, the nurses there were terrible. They were asking me why I was crying and laughing at me and I'm not even exaggerating.

They treat you like a criminal.

Ending up in suicide watch actually making it worse for my condition.

That is absolutely horrible. So sorry you were treated that way. As someone who has struggled with suicidality in the past, I can only imagine how shitty that made you feel.

 

[Darkmakaimura]

Jesus dude. My heart goes out to you truly and honestly. I simply meant my experience.

I guess I was lucky. Spent Christmas tanked up (drugged) to my head, was terrible.

I wouldn't wish it on an enemy. The nurses here are something special, underpaid and very very over-worked.

All very young. Yet they take joy in their life. Makes you change thoughts. Both ways.

I walked out of the ward and my jaw dropped at a nurse. She offered me tea, I said no just wanted sleeping tablets.

I slept with a smile on my face.

That is absolutely horrible. So sorry you were treated that way. As someone who has struggled with suicidality in the past, I can only imagine how shitty that made you feel.

One of the nurses there had a thick Filipino accent so I didn't understand her at times and she ask me if I was stupid because I couldn't understand her.

Another doctor just asked me why I was crying and didn't do it in a caring way. More like "what they hell are you crying?" even if he didn't put it that way.

For what it's worth, this was Sunrise Medical Center in Las Vegas. I'm almost sure my dad told me they had a lot of malpractice suits there.

 

[Sosokrates]

That is infuriating to read.

When I was in suicide watch, the nurses there were terrible. They were asking me why I was crying and laughing at me and I'm not even exaggerating.

They treat you like a criminal.

Ending up in suicide watch actually making it worse for my condition.

If I was in that situation that behaviour would definitely make me want to fuck with the nurses.

 

[Scotty W]

Just gotta get over it dude

 

[DKPOWPOW]

We all go thru bad times in life. And friends help... Sometimes. Sometimes they're never there when you need them, and then you find new friends. Who are there when you need em. Sometimes.

Patience is a kind word, but also a mean one. Because some people wait their whole lives for something that never happens.

Best I can say is, realize whatever it is you need in this world you can find it. But you have have to try, without trying. It's an odd thing. Try too much and it's an act of desperation, try too little and it's laziness.

There is a sweet spot to all things. Find the sweet spot.

 

[Grildon Tundy]

We all go thru bad times in life. And friends help... Sometimes. Sometimes they're never there when you need them, and then you find new friends. Who are there when you need em. Sometimes.

Patience is a kind word, but also a mean one. Because some people wait their whole lives for something that never happens.

Best I can say is, realize whatever it is you need in this world you can find it. But you have have to try, without trying. It's an odd thing. Try too much and it's an act of desperation, try too little and it's laziness.

There is a sweet spot to all things. Find the sweet spot.

Kind of like: you have to try but with the confidence you'll be okay if it falls through?

 

[DKPOWPOW]

Kind of like: you have to try but with the confidence you'll be okay if it falls through?

Yeah

 

[Scotty W]

 

[22:22:22]

You're not alone and i have a similar story regarding losing a friend. No real life friends atm besides a lady friend that wants more than I and Con-Z-epT but that's 99% app contact (high five)

I Live very, very solitary. Order benzos to keep sane. I also used to have Lorezepam.

I stopped smoking. I sand papered my kitchen. Needs a new coat of paint and feel pressured going to the gym tomorrow.

Gonna play some Demon's Souls and Gran Turismo 7. Make some smoked salmon wraps and hit the sack early.

And hey. Depression sucks. Don't have it as severe as last year and the benzos help with the anxiety... Wanna say I know how you feel but I don't.

 

[22:22:22]

So, long story short. Have depression and anxiety among others. Doctor is traveling and I don't want to wake up my therapist at this moment (2 am).

Since 2020 I lost my friends because I did something awful. Not gonna say what it is, since it pains me. I'm NOT doing this thread for any form of suicide, I just want someone to talk. Please don't judge me.
2 years without friends is hard, even knowing I deserve. I'm depressed mostly because of that. Just want some people to talk about music, or movies/games. That's all. Some small talk.

Not trying to be a burden. For real.

Meds I'm using if anyone wants to know:

Spoiler

Latuda 40mg, Trazodone ER 150mg, Lorazepam 6mg, Artane 5mg.

Yo OP. You're no alone. Lost my friend group about 10 years ago because I wasn't doing well.

Reconnected through xbox with acquaintance and became best bro's for a year or 3. I did something stupid as well (not going to mention) and he broke contact with me. I've been living in solitary for the last decade minus the last 3 years where I met a woman who became a friend, fuck buddy and friends again. She fell in love. I didn't. So she's moving on and for a while i was back to being alone. Recently it's going better (breakthrough on the psychological side) and rejoined the gym so I'm having some social contact again. It's also the reason I post the way I do I guess... saying friend and brother, I'm happy you guys and gals are here; even tho I have my bad days and show my other face here. The face that's the result of all the above.

I wish I didn't have so much shit in my own head to be any kind of meaningful help to you but know that you are and deserved to be loved regardless. We are here to learn therefore we make mistakes whicho sometimes have consequences that are quite severe. You, I and many others know this

Keep up keeping up



2222

Guess I posted already