"It's funny, isn't it, Michael... although one goes to bed, apparently free of grit, when you wake up, you're bed's full of bits."
"I don't know Vyvian, I can never see my matching undersheet for chicks."
"Heh, yeah! I have the same problem with fleas. You see, without my spectacles, fleas and bits look almost identical... not that a flea's going to be wearing my spectacles."
"Ha, nice one Vyv, the act's really coming along!"
"Thanks, Mike."
----------------------
:vyvian puts an empty cup into the teakettle:
"Mike, Mike... there's a cup of tea in the pot!"
"He's only improvising, but Shakespeare could've written his material"
"ha ha haaa ha."
-----------------------
"I HAD HALF AN APPLE IN THERE! Alright, who's taken it?!"
"What you were doing? Saving it for teacher? Trying to keep the doctor away?"
"If he's anything like YOU, yes! Was it you who took it, Mike?"
"If you're going to sin, you might as well be original..."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I don't know."
------------------------
"This may sound like a stupid question... lip nip bip vip pip?"
"Yes, it does."
-------------------------
"I got 'war' tattooed on this hand, 'peace' tattooed on this hand, and I got the brothers Karamazov on my back, but you can't see that, because... y'know, I got me shirt on."
"Doesn't it hurt?"
"Naw, it's cotton and polyester blend."
---------------------------------------------
etc.