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I think it's time for me to accept the fact that this World will never be the same again from this point on (Time To Escape Into My Own Delusion)

MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
I think I'm done with this world, the ambitions and goals that I had for it, the dreams and creative pursuits that I kept envisioning, and the financial stability that keeps eluding me ever since 2015.

Time for me to escape into my own little fantasy world where everything seems okay in the form of games, films, shows, anime, porn, etc. There is no reason for me to plan out a future anymore as things are in complete flux at the moment.

In terms of job career, I think I'm too late into the game and I may eventually migrate to Medinah and live a very impoverished but spiritually fulfilling life since I won't have any job skills to transfer with me.

I expected the 2020's to be the Last Great Decade, but it seems like we are in for a fucking ride, and not the kind that you get in an amusement park. I'm gonna treat this year and the next as my last years before permanently escaping away from all this madness and work towards living a normandic-like life in the beautiful city of Medinah.
 
EviLore

EviLore

Expansive Ellipses
Staff Member
Don’t have skills? Study, work, gain skills. The barrier to entry in the job market for a driven individual in your age bracket is minimal.

Your dream of becoming a beggar in Medina is no different than living under the bridge here. It would likely end quickly and unceremoniously with your death, or worse. It’s not only escapist fantasy but a very low point to be aiming your escapism toward.

Ditch the mopey self-loathing as it only serves to harm you, and you shouldn’t tolerate self-harm. Put the effort in to build a life for yourself and everything else you long for will follow naturally.
 
MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
EviLore said:
Don’t have skills? Study, work, gain skills. The barrier to entry in the job market for a driven individual in your age bracket is minimal.

Your dream of becoming a beggar in Medina is no different than living under the bridge here. It would likely end quickly and unceremoniously with your death, or worse. It’s not only escapist fantasy but a very low point to be aiming your escapism toward.

Ditch the mopey self-loathing as it only serves to harm you, and you shouldn’t tolerate self-harm. Put the effort in to build a life for yourself and everything else you long for will follow naturally.
Click to expand...
Damn, I didn't expect this and I won't lie: this is the harsh truth.

It may be the confusion and instability of my part of the world and I'm using it as an excuse to run away from responsibility.
 
Last edited:
MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
EviLore said:
Don’t have skills? Study, work, gain skills. The barrier to entry in the job market for a driven individual in your age bracket is minimal.

Your dream of becoming a beggar in Medina is no different than living under the bridge here. It would likely end quickly and unceremoniously with your death, or worse. It’s not only escapist fantasy but a very low point to be aiming your escapism toward.

Ditch the mopey self-loathing as it only serves to harm you, and you shouldn’t tolerate self-harm. Put the effort in to build a life for yourself and everything else you long for will follow naturally.
Click to expand...
I will say this: I've always planned to migrate back to that part of the Middle East as part of my journey after establishing a career here in North America. Medinah will always be my place to retire in my 50's/60's depending on the circumstances.

What I wrote was real and not an attempt to clickbait. With that being said, I think you of all people understood what I was trying to do the best: looking for feedback in regards to my train of thought.

I'm glad you didn't pity me and instead gave me a good wake-up jolt to my fragile self that always wants ease and never a burden or responsibility.

I admit: I'm not strong when comes to self-resolve and tend to make up these fantasies to escape the harsh reality that I ultimately put myself into regardless if there were others to fault/blame.

I'll end this post by saying this: I'll never end up becoming a beggar on the street because I know I'm much more worth than that, at the very least. I have the skills, education, and support to work a decent job, worst case scenario. I think that's something I should always remind myself: the opportunity to work hard and earn a decent living will always be there; I just have to use it.
 
EviLore

EviLore

Expansive Ellipses
Staff Member
MiyazakiHatesKojima MiyazakiHatesKojima

Derive inspiration from far-off goals, but focus your energy on what you can do right now to improve your circumstances. You're smart and capable? Excellent: show me by doing something with it.

Are you unemployed or at a dead end? There are many "boot camps" now that can kickstart a new career path without four years of college. Coding, UX, cybersecurity, etc., will all open up opportunities for high paying in-demand jobs. Many offer an ISA where you can repay the tuition after landing a job in the field.

Or go into a trade. Or go to college for a STEM field at a state school with in-state tuition. Done, life sorted.

Or talk to friends and family and offer to work as an unpaid intern in some capacity for someone's small business. Immerse yourself in what you need to learn for the job, outperform expectations, make yourself indispensable, and you will soon find yourself hired.

Whatever the path you choose, you walk down it while seizing life by the balls and not letting go. Nothing has ever been achieved in the history of our species through idle self-pity.
 
BadBurger

BadBurger

Is 'That Pure Potato'
It's never too late to develop marketable skills. You can ask around industries you're interested in and get ahead of the curve. I know a guy who had a modest tiling business until he was 38 or so, but was always a hobbyist when it came to computing (built his and his kids PC's, his home network, messed around with web dev). Took online courses for cloud computing, earning a two year degree and something like seven certifications in the process. Went from grunt work, having to handle a small business and all that entails and several employees for a net of about $50k a year, to a cushy office job with us for about $90k plus benefits.

You can do it, just need to plan and follow through.
 
-YFC-

-YFC-

Member
If you're in your 20's and 30's then you have plenty of time to learn some new skills needed for a job. Not doing that is just an excuse to be lazy.
if it really comes to that, worst case scenario, you can always sell your body on the street :messenger_beaming:
 
MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
EviLore said:
MiyazakiHatesKojima MiyazakiHatesKojima

Derive inspiration from far-off goals, but focus your energy on what you can do right now to improve your circumstances. You're smart and capable? Excellent: show me by doing something with it.

Are you unemployed or at a dead end? There are many "boot camps" now that can kickstart a new career path without four years of college. Coding, UX, cybersecurity, etc., will all open up opportunities for high paying in-demand jobs. Many offer an ISA where you can repay the tuition after landing a job in the field.

Or go into a trade. Or go to college for a STEM field at a state school with in-state tuition. Done, life sorted.

Or talk to friends and family and offer to work as an unpaid intern in some capacity for someone's small business. Immerse yourself in what you need to learn for the job, outperform expectations, make yourself indispensable, and you will soon find yourself hired.

Whatever the path you choose, you walk down it while seizing life by the balls and not letting go. Nothing has ever been achieved in the history of our species through idle self-pity.
Click to expand...
It's interesting to see the tech world becoming such a reliable source of job employment even during the midst of all this economic uncertainty. That's definitely something I'm keeping as a back-up plan in the near future if things don't go well for my career in public health.

One thing that I do have in my immediate goal is to enter the world of E-Health: A Form of Electronic Health Care delivery where patients can connect with their family doctors and GPS in the form of electronic communication.

This field is booming from where I currently live, and I've already applied for a position there, but I didn't get accepted. The reason was because I lacked adequate work experience and that's my fault as I could've worked while getting a student loan for my degree.

I'm hoping by July/August, that field will open up more and expand their operations as they gauge the availability of walk-in clinics in the months to come. It may sound messed up to say, but the CoVid-19 gave E-Health an immense boost in terms of investor interest.

What I think happened to me over the past weeks is a complete isolated point of view on my circumstances developed as a result of this lockdown, which led me to what I wrote in the OP.

I don't want my last 5 years of post-secondary education go to waste, and I think I'm eventually going to have to make a choice whether I stick to this field or move on to more stable fields like STEM and those IT-related bootcamps that you mentioned.
 
Keihart

Keihart

Member
MiyazakiHatesKojima said:
I think I'm done with this world, the ambitions and goals that I had for it, the dreams and creative pursuits that I kept envisioning, and the financial stability that keeps eluding me ever since 2015.

Time for me to escape into my own little fantasy world where everything seems okay in the form of games, films, shows, anime, porn, etc. There is no reason for me to plan out a future anymore as things are in complete flux at the moment.

In terms of job career, I think I'm too late into the game and I may eventually migrate to Medinah and live a very impoverished but spiritually fulfilling life since I won't have any job skills to transfer with me.

I expected the 2020's to be the Last Great Decade, but it seems like we are in for a fucking ride, and not the kind that you get in an amusement park. I'm gonna treat this year and the next as my last years before permanently escaping away from all this madness and work towards living a normandic-like life in the beautiful city of Medinah.
Click to expand...
 
MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
Keihart said:
Click to expand...

ごめんなさい, 先生！
V8d2JFB.png
 
Last edited:
K

Kempton

Neo Member
Evil lore pretty much got it. Self pity is death, I know the trap well.
Video games/movies/porn are mostly cheap crap so I’d also suggest reading a bit deeper. Maybe look into philosophy and the classics (not just specifically western). Humans have been pushing that bolder up the hill and then describing the experience for an eternity so go see what they say.

(Take the following with a grain of salt, its half baked forum wisdom and a bit of a projection on my part)

Are you religious? I suspect a certain kind of conservative would say y’all need need Jesus, which I don’t think is specifically correct but does point to a lack of moral identity. What I mean by that is a religious person gets equiped with time tested pro social virtues. These are included by default and act as core truths to build ones life around. You strike me as the typical lost, nihilistic, 21st century person who lacks any clear sense of identity because there are no core principles to constantly aspire to. I don’t just mean shallow things like ‘get a good job‘ or ’obey the social conventions’ I mean read deeply and develop your own principles to live by.
 
MiyazakiHatesKojima

MiyazakiHatesKojima

Banned
Kempton said:
Evil lore pretty much got it. Self pity is death, I know the trap well.
Video games/movies/porn are mostly cheap crap so I’d also suggest reading a bit deeper. Maybe look into philosophy and the classics (not just specifically western). Humans have been pushing that bolder up the hill and then describing the experience for an eternity so go see what they say.

(Take the following with a grain of salt, its half baked forum wisdom and a bit of a projection on my part)

Are you religious? I suspect a certain kind of conservative would say y’all need need Jesus, which I don’t think is specifically correct but does point to a lack of moral identity. What I mean by that is a religious person gets equiped with time tested pro social virtues. These are included by default and act as core truths to build ones life around. You strike me as the typical lost, nihilistic, 21st century person who lacks any clear sense of identity because there are no core principles to constantly aspire to. I don’t just mean shallow things like ‘get a good job‘ or ’obey the social conventions’ I mean read deeply and develop your own principles to live by.
Click to expand...
At the moment, ive just been trying to deal with personal experiences that i haven't fully come in terms of with, so its not that I'm nihilistic and lost. I'd say that I haven't fully matured as a human being yet, so I'm a bit lost on what I should do.

Luckily, I've gotten some great responses in this thread and given me some much needed hope and motivation to look forward to the near future.

And yes, I am religious and I'm still developing my spiritual identity with each passing year. I wont speak about this side of me as I find it to be extremely personal, but thankfully I haven't entered that trap of nihilism.

When it comes to games, films, anime, music, I always try to experience the best works of those respective mediums, and they act as stepping stones for me to delve into the real classic literature that you've mentioned.
 
bitbydeath

bitbydeath

Member
You had ambitions and goals?
If so, you are already further ahead than a lot of the population who just go through the motions of living.

They work in jobs they don’t like and are just there to scrape just enough money to do it all again tomorrow.

This doesn’t have to be you but you need a plan, not a get rich quick plan or a massive jump to suddenly being where you want without the hoops in between, a real plan.

You must first stop being a zombie and living each day the same, you need to shake things up. It could even be small things to get you started like going out of your way for someone else.

You control your life and only you can make the change. Hone in on what makes you happy and get out of your comfort zone.
 
captainraincoat

captainraincoat

Banned
MiyazakiHatesKojima said:
I think I'm done with this world, the ambitions and goals that I had for it, the dreams and creative pursuits that I kept envisioning, and the financial stability that keeps eluding me ever since 2015.

Time for me to escape into my own little fantasy world where everything seems okay in the form of games, films, shows, anime, porn, etc. There is no reason for me to plan out a future anymore as things are in complete flux at the moment.

In terms of job career, I think I'm too late into the game and I may eventually migrate to Medinah and live a very impoverished but spiritually fulfilling life since I won't have any job skills to transfer with me.

I expected the 2020's to be the Last Great Decade, but it seems like we are in for a fucking ride, and not the kind that you get in an amusement park. I'm gonna treat this year and the next as my last years before permanently escaping away from all this madness and work towards living a normandic-like life in the beautiful city of Medinah.
Click to expand...
Never treat life as a straight road you must follow....you need to make your own tracks if you want to be happy outside of everyone else following that same road.
 
Jooxed

Jooxed

Gold Member
Buy a Nintendo Switch.


I didn’t go back to school to do something different until later into my 20s and at that point half of my class was in their 30s and 40s and older never too late to make a change man.

belmarduk said:
You want to move to Saudi Arabia? Are you from there or something?
Click to expand...

I believe he is.
 
Rentahamster

Rentahamster

Rodent Whores
MiyazakiHatesKojima said:
I think I'm done with this world, the ambitions and goals that I had for it, the dreams and creative pursuits that I kept envisioning, and the financial stability that keeps eluding me ever since 2015.

Time for me to escape into my own little fantasy world where everything seems okay in the form of games, films, shows, anime, porn, etc. There is no reason for me to plan out a future anymore as things are in complete flux at the moment.

In terms of job career, I think I'm too late into the game and I may eventually migrate to Medinah and live a very impoverished but spiritually fulfilling life since I won't have any job skills to transfer with me.

I expected the 2020's to be the Last Great Decade, but it seems like we are in for a fucking ride, and not the kind that you get in an amusement park. I'm gonna treat this year and the next as my last years before permanently escaping away from all this madness and work towards living a normandic-like life in the beautiful city of Medinah.
Click to expand...
You're overreacting.

We're going to be fine.

If you give up now, the recovery will leave your ass behind. The only people who truly have zero opportunity are the quitters.
 
Ten_Fold

Ten_Fold

Member
Get a certification in IT to start, like network security,sysadmin,python etc. Should only take you a few months tops to get an entry level position, and nowadays it’s much easier to even find a remote position so you don’t have a commute. Life is tough, the gap between rich and poor is extremely wide nowadays, more so if you live in a big city. You got this!!
 
teezzy

teezzy

Banned
Real change comes from within.

Eat healthy and exercise. Meditate. Be mindful of your wardrobe. Read more. Clean your living area. Eventually that inertia alone will guide you to bigger and better things. Others will get caught up in your positivity and discipline. Life is a series of inputs and outputs.

You're a lot stronger and more clever than you realize.
 
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