Is it bad that I still see some consistent internal logic with the shit Kotaku is used to churn out?
Feminist critical theory. Check.
"Let's unpack this" for a moment. Let's review this review.
Elsa's Let It Go musical number isn't a mundane cutscene, it's an important sacred feminist sermon preaching about Elsa's liberation from society. The mere presence of three penis-donning lifeforms is according to the reviewer TAINTING this sacred ceremony.
The word "voyeurism" is used, which implies her dignity is being defiled by their presence and witnessing the scene. Their uncritical admiration for her musical number didn't save them.
Goofy and Donald's voice are an affront to the sacred event, SHUT UP, you are unintentionally invoking a "meta" TROPE that might indirectly make Elsa seem as less-than-perfect than the Mary Sue she is, and the viewer might be incited to laugh.
Autism. Check.
Analyzed a 36 line dialogue through the prismatic kalediscope and then a period blood stained concave lens of intersectional critical theory to check for narrative dissonances.
"Hey I played the game" Game related anecdote. Check.
The selfies don't give the player enough options, or whatever the player random action does don't all necessarily factor in the true ending (whereas if they did... the arcane, complicated, random ending requirements would be controversy bait). Not enough optional selfies with Disney princesses that are needed -as political statements of couse, no matter how little it makes sense for the story, even by KH standards- as MAJOR plot twists. Also I really hate Sora, this PTSD addled retard and wish he'd collapse under his complexes' weight already.
Sensitivity signaling. Check.
The anecdote with the random Japanese lady serves as a grim reminder how offense ready the review is at strangers poking his mind for conversion starters, because they are invading his/her privacy, YET the reviewer is all too willing to make the review all about himself, not the game, and take pride in voicing his egocentric worldview.
The very fact this contradiction between hostility at the thought strangers are interested in his egosphere, and expectation that his egosphere is all important, is voiced in this review, is not a coincidence. It's a WARNING.
Like bright colors and polka dots on poisonous tropical frogs, this is a very clear message.
I am a very triggered, highly sensitive person.
After a long sensitivity training, I am a mass of danger to behold.
The person best equipped to speak on matters of offending material.
Do not make light of my words. They are valuable.
Heed my words if you value your digital life, lest my fury befalls you.
The tl;dr?
KH3 is worthless. Its story isn't enough of a political statement. The one political statement I love (Elsa) was ruined by the presence of that shitty cast from the game. Too much game, not enough politics. Also, I'm a dangerous reviewer Square Enix and you better look out, your Elsa scene barely saved you, but it and the other princesses is NOT ENOUGH and you really messed up.