andythinkpad
Member
Just close the door man. I am cool with bathroom relief. Some time a man is got to let of some steam.
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What if this was some SPEED kind of situation, where if the guy stopped masturbating, a bomb in the White House would go off? Maybe the phone was to document the feat to the bad guys.
Oh no, no. Same town, about maybe 5 minutes walk apart, but different dudes. My anime shop tugger was a tall homeless dude that lived in the mall. Lowe's guy was apparently not tall.
SliceSabre
Banned
This seems even riskier.
Lactose_Intolerant
Member
I'm a home depot man myself
SecretMoblin
Member
Speak for yourself.
Great, now I have that in my search history.
Already Torn
Banned
I just assume everyone is masturbating whenever they're not directly in my field of view.
EvilEvoVIII
Banned
My guess is that there were kids around. That's not cool if kids are around, especially if he's making a concerted effort to keep the door open. That's just gross.
It's just about a couple nuts.
FelixOrion
Poet Centuriate
he was just trying to get some polishing done
MrToughPants
Brian Burke punched my mom
Well then.
TickleMeElbow
Member
Why do people masturbate openly in public lol? You can get in big trouble for that.
When I was in college this dude was caught masturbating at the back of the campus bus.
I was sitting there one morning minding my own business, when I hear some murmuring behind me. A girl walks up to the front of the bus and starts whispering to the bus driver. I turn around and see this makeshift "shelter", where this guy had draped a jacket over himself and the seat infront of him. The bus stops at the next stop, and the driver says something on the radio.
We're just sitting there for awhile, and at this point I'm confused like "the fuck?". This whole time the dude is still in his shelter oblivious. A couple minutes later the campus police show up, board the bus, and tap the shelter. The dude emerges from his shelter with headphones on, and has this "OH SHIT" look when he sees the police standing there lol. Dude looked like a student too, not some random homeless person. The police escort him off the bus, and everyone at the back starts cracking up. I'm like "what happened?", and this girl a couple seats behind me was like "that guy was masturbating!"
As the bus starts moving, one guy goes "at least he was a lover and not a fighter" lol. I still wonder what happened to that kid...
When I was in college this dude was caught masturbating at the back of the campus bus.
I was sitting there one morning minding my own business, when I hear some murmuring behind me. A girl walks up to the front of the bus and starts whispering to the bus driver. I turn around and see this makeshift "shelter", where this guy had draped a jacket over himself and the seat infront of him. The bus stops at the next stop, and the driver says something on the radio.
We're just sitting there for awhile, and at this point I'm confused like "the fuck?". This whole time the dude is still in his shelter oblivious. A couple minutes later the campus police show up, board the bus, and tap the shelter. The dude emerges from his shelter with headphones on, and has this "OH SHIT" look when he sees the police standing there lol. Dude looked like a student too, not some random homeless person. The police escort him off the bus, and everyone at the back starts cracking up. I'm like "what happened?", and this girl a couple seats behind me was like "that guy was masturbating!"
As the bus starts moving, one guy goes "at least he was a lover and not a fighter" lol. I still wonder what happened to that kid...
How else are you going to share the load?
They get the job done and their work lasts longer too
Mammoth Jones
Member
Disgusting.
Caught a homeless dude masturbating in the Penn Station customer waiting area. Was with my wife and was really angry. Kept wondering what was that NASTY smell wafting in the air I knew it was unwashed ass but it was super pungent. Then I look over 20 feet and see dude with his sweatpants down just going to town.
Thankfully the cops were just around the corner and I just went and got them.
Caught a homeless dude masturbating in the Penn Station customer waiting area. Was with my wife and was really angry. Kept wondering what was that NASTY smell wafting in the air I knew it was unwashed ass but it was super pungent. Then I look over 20 feet and see dude with his sweatpants down just going to town.
Thankfully the cops were just around the corner and I just went and got them.
Jerking it at the hardware store is "perfectly fine" as long as you remember to close the door?
It really is tag worthy.
Phobophile
A scientist and gentleman in the manner of Batman.
I don't think you checked all that hard.
The struggle
WAIT
Lowes and HD are now cruising spots? Holy shit......pretty soon its going to be my PokeStop XD
PokeSlop.
SirUltimos
Member
That's what makes it exciting.
Brianimaniac
Banned
You should always rub one out before making important decisions, so I'm sure this guy was just clearing his head before deciding on which color paint to buy for his kitchen renovation.
That's tag worthy.
Jackula.
No, you stopped them from busting.
PepsimanVsJoe
Member
Ugh...that reminds me.
Back when I worked at Target (15 or so years ago), I caught someone reading a porno mag in the food court. They weren't even trying to be low-profile, by hiding the magazine in another book or something.
Later that day I saw him do an awkward run from the restroom and then out the front door.
So I didn't catch him in the act... but yeah...
Back when I worked at Target (15 or so years ago), I caught someone reading a porno mag in the food court. They weren't even trying to be low-profile, by hiding the magazine in another book or something.
Later that day I saw him do an awkward run from the restroom and then out the front door.
So I didn't catch him in the act... but yeah...
That's an interesting choice of words to use. Do you and your father regularly go around helping each other "bust" dudes?
My god.
Visualante2
Member
In the cubicle? How would a kid see anything?
edit. Read it again. Holding the door open? What the..
edit. Read it again. Holding the door open? What the..
SwiftDeath
Member
Your family crest must be interesting
TheSpoiler
Member
I like how your dad bumped chests with a dude who's cock was still hard and got into a shoving match.
What a scene that must have been!
What a scene that must have been!
"Son, your old man has been fataly impaled. He is in there on the bathroom floor, only has minutes. Now are you going to get me off or what?"
That is excellent life experience.
Mercury Fred
Banned
I misread the title and thought your dad was getting some =/
family_guy
Member
Why did I read this as "My dad got caught jacking off a guy at Lowe's"
I never thought about it but I guess that is pretty funny lol
Ragelink26
Member
I feel like this post isn't getting enough attention
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