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[Screaming_Gremlin]

I don't even know what to say.

German men told they can no longer stand and deliver
By Kate Connolly
(Filed: 18/08/2004)


German men are being shamed into urinating while sitting down by a gadget which is saving millions of women from cleaning up in the bathroom after them.

The WC ghost, a £6 voice-alarm, reprimands men for standing at the lavatory pan. It is triggered when the seat is lifted. The battery-operated devices are attached to the seats and deliver stern warnings to those who attempt to stand and urinate (known as "Stehpinkeln").

"Hey, stand-peeing is not allowed here and will be punished with fines, so if you don't want any trouble, you'd best sit down," one of the devices orders in a voice impersonating the German leader, Chancellor Gerhard Schroder. Another has a voice similar to that of his predecessor, Helmut Kohl.

The manufacturers of the WC ghost, Patentwert, say they are ready to direct their gadgets at the British market.

Their prototype English-speaking WC ghost says in an American drawl: "Don't you go wetting this floor cowboy, you never know who's behind you. So sit down, get your water pistol in the bowl where it belongs. Ha, ha, ha."

They also plan to copy the voices of Tony Blair and the Queen.

So far 1.8 million WC ghosts have been sold in German supermarkets.

But Klaus Schwerma, author of Standing Urinators: The Last Bastion of Masculinity? doubts whether it will ever be possible to convert all men.

"Many insist on standing, even though it leads to much marital strife," he said.

 

[tt_deeb]

Too damn funny.

 

[Archaix]

So they just won't lift the seat at all. This seems like a much better idea...

 

[Hamfam]

You can stand right next to me, and shout that at me in person, and all I'm gonna do is pee in your mouth. No electronic device is going to tame ME.

 

[8bit]

The Germans don't lift. I assume they attach sprinklers to the end of their knobs to ensure maximum piss distribution all over the seat.

 

[Mason]

I'd just piss all over the seat.

 

[bishoptl]

You can stand right next to me, and shout that at me in person, and all I'm gonna do is pee in your mouth. No electronic device is going to tame ME.

You and me both, man! We'll spray seats in solidarity!

 

[ConfusingJazz]

you could just take out the batteries to piss in peace.

 

[Pochacco]

(1) Men don't care if something is yelling at them.
(2) Men could just pee all over the seat.
(3) If they're that paranoid, why not just super-glue the seat to the bowl?



I should invent a toilet that has a button that raises the toilet seat and lowers the toilet seat automatically upon flushing. They probably have those in japan..

 

[Hitokage]

German men are being shamed into urinating while sitting down by a gadget which is saving millions of women from cleaning up in the bathroom after them.

What the hell? Are there no male janitors in Germany?

BTW, I've had to clean a public restroom before, and the stuff I found in the women's restroom was consistently nastier.

 

[Nikashi]

What the hell? Are there no male janitors in Germany?

BTW, I've had to clean a public restroom before, and the stuff I found in the women's restroom was consistently nastier.

Fact: I've had to clean feces off of the sink and mirrors of a restaurant washroom.

Fact: It was the ladies'

 

[Wolfy]

Let's design a giant bucket, that is so big it's impossible to sit down, so that females would have to pee standing up.