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What is good sex like?

haxan7

Volunteered as Tribute
May 9, 2016
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Fairly good health. Mid thirties. Fairly fit and in good enough, with regular exercise. However, I've always suffered from ED, which is where the majority of my problems come from. I've tried medication and what not and it didn't help.
I wonder if you have some hidden fetish you don’t know about that you can’t get turned on without. Just thinking out loud.
 
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nush

Gold Member
Oct 16, 2017
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A long haul flight from wherever you are.
Fairly good health. Mid thirties. Fairly fit and in good enough, with regular exercise. However, I've always suffered from ED, which is where the majority of my problems come from. I've tried medication and what not and it didn't help.

You've grown up with an infinite supply of porn piped into your home. Of course the real thing isn't going to match up to that fantasy sex. Porn isn't real sex.
 
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Javthusiast

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Mar 20, 2017
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You’re asking on a gaming forum, we can only guess.
Sad Kristen Bell GIF
 

MrFancypants

Member
Dec 17, 2019
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Not Oxford
You've grown up with an infinite supply of porn piped into your home. Of course the real thing isn't going to match up to that fantasy sex. Porn isn't real sex.
But if you try recreating your favourite triple anal penetration scene at home with two horny coeds, doesn’t that then mean the porn you watched is real?
 
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Tschumi

Gold Member
Jul 4, 2020
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I'm lucky, my sexual partner orgasms very easily, so every time we 'bonk' (as she cutely calls it) she has a go first, orgasms, then it's all wet and ready for me to go to town. She also has all the right curves and jiggles, and the right perverted mind. Also a different ethnicity that is physically smaller than me. So that's good sex.

Yep, I'm a lucky guy. *smmmmmmmmmmirk*
 
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IntentionalPun

Ask me about my wife's perfect butthole
Aug 28, 2019
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I like to mix in some passionate kissing kinda sex, with some get up and pound away kinda sex... throw in some light choking.. some ass slapping.. definitely some tongue in ass action.

Good sex is fun, tiring, and is just sex that afterwards makes you feel like a fucking sex God.

It helps when you are fucking and the girl (or girls) say "you are a sex God."
 
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Nov 24, 2016
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Fairly good health. Mid thirties. Fairly fit and in good enough, with regular exercise. However, I've always suffered from ED, which is where the majority of my problems come from. I've tried medication and what not and it didn't help.
It sounds mental to me. I with with my wife for 10years and we had great sex. Then we split up and I got with this young kind of crazy chick and I had that issue the first time. It had been so long since I been with anyone else. My mind just raced. I don't know why and it never happened before my wife when I was dating. It was embarrassing at the time. I think you need to talk to someone.

3 years is a long time. Especially when your married. How does she feel about this? Have you talked to her about it? Do you love her? Is the relationship good other wise? I feel like there is some major underlying problems if your in your 30s and haven't slept with your wife in 3 years.

Good luck man. Don't loose hope.
 
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Sosokrates

Founder of western console warring.
Feb 22, 2017
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Thats something you have to find out for yourself.

Though I find that I had unrealistic expectations.
 

Ozzy Onya A2Z

Member
Apr 16, 2012
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Melbourne, Australia
Kind of tough situation since I'm married lol
I'd figure a few things out first mate -
  • Stop watching porn and/or taking care of things yourself. Allow your natural libido to build and drive your desire. Don't take care of it yourself. You're short circuiting things physically, emotionally and chemically which can rob your relationship from intimacy.
  • Talk to your wife. NOT from your perspective but hers. Does she have desire? Does she want to improve? Does she prefer to take care of things herself instead too? I hate to raise it but often sexless marriages equate to cheating. I'd clear that from your own and/or her thoughts too. If cheating has occurred and you're still together you need to leave that shit behind and clear the path forward before intimacy can return. Otherwise you're kidding yourselves.
  • Now you can focus on having fun instead of "sex". There isn't a hard and fast rule, pardon the pun, just have fun. You both may find mutual masturbation more fun or the foreplay before penetrative sex. Oral, toys, outside adventures, spontaneity, blind fold, tie her up, talk dirty, make some noise in bed yourself so you start that feedback loop with your partner etc. Try things and see what works.
  • Workout who is submissive and who is dominant or interchange the roles. You may find just taking charge, not talking and just doing leads to far more fun.
  • See a couples sex therapist and learn to enjoy the uncomfortable as well as laugh things off. Stop being so serious about sex.
  • Do you have kids? Those little fuckers are massive intimacy blockers. A joy to have but FFS drop them off to friends or family sleepovers and plan a surprise weekend away with your wife. Go all out and don't let on until you're getting her in the car and have everything prepared for her. A change of scenery and mystery are big pluses for ladies. As is a little shared experience e.g. danger or adventure or scenic things. Sharing "first experiences" with your partner creates a longer and closer bond, never stop that adventure.
  • Check out books/porn made by women. Insight direct from the source. The best sex is enjoying it with someone and them enjoying it.
  • Remember it ain't always going to be the best sex of your life. Sometimes it's a quickie, sometimes it's a sweating athletic sport fuck and other times it's about sharing yourself with your partner.
  • If you're out of shape, get in shape. Walk, run, lift. Your sex appeal, fitness, attractiveness, confidence and all that behind the scenes that leads to those awesome moments mentally and physically come from the work around it. Better yet workout together with your wife. Endorphins and fitness.
  • Make a pact with your wife. Sex once a week for 3 months or sex everyday for 30 days. Stick to it. You'll be surprised what this can achieve even if uncomfortable to talk and initiate in the early days.
Anyhow, I'm not trying to lecture but just provide some options and ideas for you to consider. Best of luck. If you're not happy they're not happy. Have fun and the rest falls into place.

EDIT: I see you've tried ED meds etc. Have a go at this little number. No fapping for 4 days, drink 3 litres of water per day. Take 3 tablets of this per day for 2 days before you want to have sex. A little planned but worth a go here mate. Also relax and let things happen, stop thinking about your things in the moment. Focus on her and sensations of touch etc, don't be in your own head. Also don't drink any alcohol or smoke weed etc. Most people that has an adverse result. Other things to try are cock pumps and cock rings.

 
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Northeastmonk

Gold Member
Mar 18, 2013
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Omaha, NE - USA
It’s about asking the person what they want. You don’t just go at it and expect the best outcome. I don’t typically talk about my past. It started when I was 15 and I made some dumb choices in that regard. It’s probably caused a lot of skeletons to get buried in the closet, but it didn’t click in my mind until I got married. I’ve made mistakes. It hasn’t always gone the way it should, but one thing I’ve learned is that you can get better. Things can get better. Even if you have to talk it out with a therapist, like I did. You can move on. I’d also recommend buying some tools to use in the bedroom. I got to that feeling where it was boring years ago, but adding some spice always works.
 
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Thaedolus

Member
Jun 9, 2004
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Some friends of mine went to sex therapy and reported amazing results. Sounds like you should consider it too. Hell, I've considered it with my wife and I don't think there's even a problem, it just seems like it might be helpful maintenance-wise. If I felt the way you did I think I'd be setting up an appointment immediately.
 
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paparazzo

Member
Dec 14, 2008
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Fairly good health. Mid thirties. Fairly fit and in good enough, with regular exercise. However, I've always suffered from ED, which is where the majority of my problems come from. I've tried medication and what not and it didn't help.
There's a good chance your issue is psychosomatic. I've never had ED but dealt with chronic pain in this area until I learned about this stuff. I'd recommend starting with this podcast by a sex therapist who talks about ED, pelvic pain etc. and how to get better (I stumbled upon an ep about pelvic pain and found it useful).

 
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newtypepilot

Member
Aug 19, 2015
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so OP has no sex life and is married. Do you have kids? I think you need marriage therapy or something.

3 years of no sex in a marriage. Sorry, man but she's probably cheating...
 

NecrosaroIII

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Feb 2, 2020
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so OP has no sex life and is married. Do you have kids? I think you need marriage therapy or something.

3 years of no sex in a marriage. Sorry, man but she's probably cheating...
No kids.

She's very low sex drive. She used to be interested but after repeated failures and unsatisfactory sex she's given up. I have too though at the same time I hate that I can't have sex like a normal person. It's hard to describe. I don't have a biological drive to fuck, but mentally I hate that I don't and I hate that I cant.
 
Oct 26, 2018
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Find a chick that will take a load on her face and then use your dick to spread it on her face like a paintbrush, and you'll never say sex is bad.

I didn't expect that to happen. But some women are disgusting and couldnt believe it when she did it.