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LGBTQIA+ |OT8| PrEPare Yourself.

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J

JCX

Member
berzeli said:
A small but friendly reminder:
Racism is Alive and Well in the Gay Community
and I have a slight feeling this might come in handy:
V5FVDPI.gif
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noooo it's just a PREFERENCE I'm not racist!!1111
 
Monocle

Monocle

Member
Sub Boss said:
So someone said everyone is homosexual inside and you cant possibly tell unless you have "lived" it (apparently from Freud) like people that cook, knit,wash the clothes,etc are expressing their homosexuality, there is no way you can say you are gay unless you have been with another person of the same sex otherwise you could not possibly know and its all on the head.

i would like to know what you guys think about this.or if you have heard this before.
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Sexual orientation is about your romantic and sexual attractions, not behavior. It's a purely mental thing.

An orientation is not defined by totally neutral activities like cooking and knitting, lol. And it doesn't magically activate or change when you have a certain kind of sex, for that matter. Like, how would that even work? You're straight, and you suck a dick for some reason, and suddenly tits do nothing for you anymore? Or you're gay, and you have vaginal sex with a woman, and then all of a sudden you just stop being turned on by guys? Think this through, lol.

That person sounds very, very confused about the difference between traditional gender roles and sexual orientation. While it's possible to be gay and have an affinity for traditionally feminine behaviors and activities, they are two entirely separate things.
 
Astral Dog

Astral Dog

Member
Kater said:
300 would be an okay price I guess.

Man I hope this thing won't be crap. But I am so full of doubt. Urgh :(
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Was hoping for $250 but 300 would be alright depending on how good it is.
Monocle said:
Sexual orientation is about your romantic and sexual attractions, not behavior. It's a purely mental thing.

An orientation is not defined by totally neutral activities like cooking and knitting, lol. And it doesn't magically activate or change when you have a certain kind of sex, for that matter. Like, how would that even work? You're straight, and you suck a dick for some reason, and suddenly tits do nothing for you anymore? Or you're gay, and you have vaginal sex with a woman, and then all of a sudden you just stop being turned on by guys? Think this through, lol.

That person sounds very, very confused about the difference between traditional gender roles and sexual orientation. While it's possible to be gay and have an affinity for traditionally feminine behaviors and activities, they are two entirely separate things.
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He keeps comparing being Gay with wearing clothes and ordinary activities like cooking or cleaning.
Though i think he could have been saying this to push me to express myself more,maybe .He is the expert 😕
 
M

mantidor

Member
Sub Boss said:
Was hoping for $250 but 300 would be alright depending on how good it is.

He keeps comparing being Gay with wearing clothes and ordinary activities like cooking or cleaning.
Though i think he could have been saying this to push me to express myself more,maybe .He is the expert 😕
Click to expand...

Not to mention he's way off about Freud, to simplify it: in Freud's view everyone is bisexual. He considered homosexuality a deviation not because it was "wrong", he never thought that, but because it was not the norm. If you are literal about the word "deviation" homosexuality certainly is, it's not the majority, but that's all there is to it.
 
U

umop_3pisdn

Member
CornBurrito said:
Someone send help. My friends from high school and college are all getting married.
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Ppl in their mid 20s getting married is obscene. Why don't they just go and join the baby boomers while they're at it.

Right way to do it is when you're 35, and then you still both keep separate bank accounts.

/mostly joking.
 
C

CornBurrito

Member
umop_3pisdn said:
Ppl in their mid 20s getting married is obscene. Why don't they just go and join the baby boomers while they're at it.
Click to expand...

I want to be married by the time I'm 30.

I was actually fairly happy until I tried to get a pic for a dating profile today. That just plunged me into a depressive state. Hopefully sleep will fix me up.
 
U

umop_3pisdn

Member
CornBurrito said:
I want to be married by the time I'm 30.

I was actually fairly happy until I tried to get a pic for a dating profile today. That just plunged me into a depressive state. Hopefully sleep will fix me up.
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Why? I think it only makes sense to have a timeline like that after you've met someone that you think is marriage material, because then you're just anticipating the next step. But if you're not there with anyone yet then it seems like thinking too many steps ahead, and it's kind of not anchored to anything it's just sort of a free-floating idea to have unnecessary anxiety about :p

Sleep might help. Dating is a minefield of insecurity etc.
 
K

KmA

Member
I've actually thinking about marriage a lot recently which is strange because I'm 22 and I'm a mess. But there are guys younger than me getting engaged on my facebook and I'm just like... uh ok. Plus I deleted scruff and grindr for the 7th time this semester because I was never talking to anyone on there anyway. I might get tinder though I want to start dating people who like... want to actually date
 
U

umop_3pisdn

Member
KmA said:
I've actually thinking about marriage a lot recently which is strange because I'm 22 and I'm a mess. But there are guys younger than me getting engaged on my facebook and I'm just like... uh ok. Plus I deleted scruff and grindr for the 7th time this semester because I was never talking to anyone on there anyway. I might get tinder though I want to start dating people who like... want to actually date
Click to expand...

Is it that these young ppl are straight and one of them got pregnant? Because what at that age your personality and world view have a life cycle of like six months. That's not a bad thing you have to work shit out by working shit out but I don't see how marriage would fit with that. I kind of think everyone deserves a prolonged adolescence to have some life experiences and become interesting for them having happened.
 
U

umop_3pisdn

Member
CornBurrito said:
Honestly I don't know. 30 is arbitrary. I just know I don't want to be over 30 and utterly alone. I mean I don't want to be 23 and alone either, but if nothing's changed in 7 years I'll consider the situation unsalvageable.
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I think that's silly :p I'm going to be 30 in 1.5 years and I can tell you that marriage is not on the horizon for me in that time frame. But I'm way happier than I was even just two years ago. I think that for the most part living your life is an implicit skill, sort of like riding a bike or something. That is you don't really figure it out in the way you might while working out a conceptual problem, but through the course of repetition or routine you notice that stuff that bothered you before is for some reason not a problem anymore.

In some ways I think having a good sense of community or platonic adult relationships can be better for loneliness than romantic relationships. At least if you feel lonely while you're in a relationship it's kind of like loneliness x10.
 
C

CornBurrito

Member
umop_3pisdn said:
I think that's silly :p I'm going to be 30 in 1.5 years and I can tell you that marriage is not on the horizon for me in that time frame. But I'm way happier than I was even just two years ago. I think that for the most part living your life is an implicit skill, sort of like riding a bike or something. That is you don't really figure it out in the way you might while working out a problem, but through the course of repetition or routine you notice that stuff that bothered you before is for some reason not a problem anymore.

In some ways I think having a good sense of community or platonic adult relationships can be better for loneliness than romantic relationships. At least if you feel lonely while you're in a relationship it's kind of loneliness x10.
Click to expand...

I know that, but emotionally I end up comparing myself to my peers and that's when the problems roll in.
 
C

Crayons

Banned
CornBurrito said:
Honestly I don't know. 30 is arbitrary. I just know I don't want to be over 30 and utterly alone. I mean I don't want to be 23 and alone either, but if nothing's changed in 7 years I'll consider the situation unsalvageable.
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If we both reach 35 and not get married, do you wanna get married with me?
 
C

CornBurrito

Member
Crayons said:
Cool

I feel like the odds of that happening are pretty high for me. I can't seem to find anyone made of boyfriend material around here, even though there's plenty of gay men.

I just hoe myself around for whatever guys want my dick.
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Feel free to continue that even after we marry.
 
H

Henchmen21

Banned
umop_3pisdn said:
Ppl in their mid 20s getting married is obscene. Why don't they just go and join the baby boomers while they're at it.

Right way to do it is when you're 35, and then you still both keep separate bank accounts.

/mostly joking.
Click to expand...

No kidding. Most of my brother's friends who married in their 20s are now divorced.
 
V

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Crayons said:
omg nice

Maybe I should try out a gay bar. free alcohol sounds great
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Place wasn't too packed. There were about 7 guys in and we all just talked random stuff about life while some guys paid for the drinks. It was fun to be in a calm enviroment and being there made me feel welcomed. The bartender was wearing a jockstrap and that was a nice sight too. Its a 30 minute walk from the apartment so thats pretty cool. Maybe 5 mins by car.
 
V

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Crayons said:
we have lots of gay bars here but I never been

anyone know how to pick up wealthy gay men
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Just chat with guys in apps , make acquaintances and then go there and someone might just hook you up if you're cute enough 💅🏽
 
C

Crayons

Banned
Vazra said:
Just chat with guys in apps , make acquaintances and then go there and someone might just hook you up if you're cute enough 💅🏽
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I've been meeting guys at college mostly

lol hooking up is not the problem. It's really easy to hook up with whoever. But no one wants in on my messy life in terms of having a boyfriend. can't blame them I'm crazy
 
V

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Crayons said:
I've been meeting guys at college mostly

lol hooking up is not the problem. It's really easy to hook up with whoever. But no one wants in on my messy life in terms of having a boyfriend. can't blame them I'm crazy
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You just talk to them instead of showing them your dick. At the bar you talk some of the normal stuff and if comfortable enough you share more while drinking a bit. Its not too complicated. Be nice to people and they will be nice towards you.
 
B

Bladenic

Member
I got the Looking book and it's really high quality. The pics are nice and the interviews are mostly fluff but some are interesting.

I rewatched S1 and it transported back to early 2014 which was when I was still a new gay. Also Raul Castillo/Richie is like my ideal man.
 
C

Crayons

Banned
Vazra said:
You just talk to them instead of showing them your dick. At the bar you talk some of the normal stuff and if comfortable enough you share more while drinking a bit. Its not too complicated. Be nice to people and they will be nice towards you.
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I think when a guy goes on actual dates and not hookups and goes slow he's looking for a guy he can bring home to mom and I don't think that's me
 
V

Vazra

irresponsible vagina leak
Crayons said:
I think when a guy goes on actual dates and not hookups and goes slow he's looking for a guy he can bring home to mom and I don't think that's me
Click to expand...
You can just be making new acquaintances and friends. Some of the apps give you the room for that. Maybe you are thinking things ahead of time. That doesnt mean you are on a date but say meeting up to hang out with someone. If it doesnt work then enjoy the atmosphere and end the night earlier than expected.
 
D

Dany

Banned
Cosmic Bus said:
I should ask my bf's former roommate. He was a dirt poor prostitute when he met a multimillionaire; they got married a few years ago. Cher was at the wedding, they have houses all over the world, etc.
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Gurrrrl. I need to be in this loop clearly💅🏽
 
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