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Ionian

Ionian

Member
Thaedolus said:
I started mountain biking in college, and I was going with these hardcore guys…way skinnier and in better shape than me…took me on shit I wasn’t ready for. Anyway, once they took me on my favorite trail of all time, at least the downhill part. The climb up felt like a marathon of sheer exertion, where I just sat my taint on that hard seat for at last an hour without a break. Finally we got to the top, I got off my bike and everything was numb…I couldn’t feel my dick at all. I had to pull my shorts forward and reach in there to make sure it was still attached, and since it was numb it felt like fondling someone else’s flaccid cock.

Anyway my mom only asked me if I was gay that one time
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I was a keen road cyclist, prided myself on my massive journeys to work daily. I was a machine.

Years later was invited to go mountain biking in Scotland by a buddy who was a professor there. Thought it would be fun and easy, more fool me. First I tried to keep up with a girl that was a trialathon champion so winded myself quickley.

Secondly at each break for food and water I'd enjoy a delicious cigarette, the group I was with thought I was crazy but I felt invincible.

Even the worst part of the group passed me out eventually as I didn't pace myself. Last part of the trail was basically a cut tree trunk as track high over a river-bed, nearly shat myself crossing it. At this stage my group was out of sight so I did the most retarded thing ever. The track was over, it had a track downwards for the end, yet it also had one upwards if you wanted to repeat the section.

I was so tired I completely missed the exit and couldn't see my mates and swore profusely having to cycle upwards again after doing the bridge only to complete that part of the track again and arrive back at the same damn bridge. I couldn't believe it.

My mates were long finished and when I figured out I needed to go down the track and not back up (second time). I think they thought I fell off the bridge or over the side of the mountain.

The meal at the log cabin when we finally made it back to base was probably the finest I'd ever eaten. Plus I was alive. Didn't mountain bike trail again, risked using one on busy city roads like I was used to and felt safer despite constantly facing death with bad drivers in the city.

(side story, once they introduced sponsored bike and public rentals in my own city much like many places in Europe, they are the most dangerous bastards on the road by far as most can't cycle. Have been knocked down loads of times by idiots, there should be lessons and a liscense needed to use one for some people. Spend more time breaking lights and fiddling with their iPod than paying attention. It used to be cars not paying attention, that's long reversed now.
 
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Richard Packer

Richard Packer

Member
ParaSeoul said:
I don't get it whats the n word? Neogaf?
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QMuPtg0.jpg
 
Maiden Voyage

Maiden Voyage

Gold™ Member
Man, I’ll be honest here—Hawaii kinda sucks. It’s absolutely gorgeous but the crime, homelessness, and rude locals make me not want to ever come back. There are pockets that are enjoyable and we will probably stick to those for the rest of the trip. I’m also a bit bummed that there’s not as many hiking trails as I’m used to. We’ve been told by friends that live here to avoid a bunch of them due to the high number of break-ins of parked vehicles (we’ve seen a number of smashed windows since being here too).
 
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BigBooper

BigBooper

Member
Maiden Voyage said:
Man, I’ll be honest here—Hawaii kinda sucks. It’s absolutely gorgeous but the crime, homelessness, and rude locals make me not want to ever come back. There are pockets that are enjoyable and we will probably stick to those for the rest of the trip. I’m also a bit bummed that there’s not as many hiking trails as I’m used to. We’ve been told by friends that live here to avoid a bunch of them due to the high number of break-ins of parked vehicles (we’ve seen a number of smashed windshields since being here too).
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That's a bummer. I remember reading several years ago about all the homeless people winding up in Hawaii. That's probably where I'd go if I wanted to live the tent life.
 
Maiden Voyage

Maiden Voyage

Gold™ Member
BigBooper said:
That's a bummer. I remember reading several years ago about all the homeless people winding up in Hawaii. That's probably where I'd go if I wanted to live the tent life.
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It’s legal here and the beaches are mostly public so there’s a lot living there.

We have found some really cool stuff and we’ve got good restaurants still planned so it’s not all bad.

Iceland was way cheaper and overall a better experience so I would recommend that over Hawaii for anyone deciding between the two.

Next international trip, I’m leaning toward New Zealand and Japan.
 
Punished Miku

Punished Miku

Human Rights Subscription Service
Maiden Voyage said:
It’s legal here and the beaches are mostly public so there’s a lot living there.

We have found some really cool stuff and we’ve got good restaurants still planned so it’s not all bad.

Iceland was way cheaper and overall a better experience so I would recommend that over Hawaii for anyone deciding between the two.

Next international trip, I’m leaning toward New Zealand and Japan.
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I've only been out of the country once, but I was in Japan for a week. Magical place. Couldn't recommend it any more highly. Good food, good shopping, tons of historical sites. Fantastically clean. Everyone's polite (as far as I could tell). Someone in our group was hyping up Iceland on that trip actually.

Next one I'd like to do is Egypt. Gotta see the main museums and the pyramids sometime in my life.
 
ParaSeoul

ParaSeoul

Member
Have a friend who lived in Hawaii,the school system was so underfunded at one point they only had 4 days of school a week.
He didn't mind at the time though,I was kinda jealous.
 
ParaSeoul

ParaSeoul

Member
Was trying to find a thread that posted a few hours ago and I just couldn't find it,not even locked just straight up erased. Thought I was going crazy before I checked my search history.
 
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BadBurger

BadBurger

Many “Whelps”! Handle It!
It was Autumn. The leaves surrounding the monastery were aflame with the brights of the season. Beckoned, the boy drew near to the priest and took a seat on the crude stone bench aside him.

"Good Thomas", the Father opened, "Would thou fuck a witch without a condom?".
 
Thaedolus

Thaedolus

Member
BadBurger said:
It was Autumn. The leaves surrounding the monastery were aflame with the brights of the season. Beckoned, the boy drew near to the priest and took a seat on the crude stone bench aside him.

"Good Thomas", the Father opened, "Would thou fuck a witch without a condom?".
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“Dear father, it depends on the witch,” Thomas replied. “Dost this witch sport a soggy pile of bologna for a vagina?”
 
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